My Best Friend
by SpicyPepper-SweetSugar
Summary: I can't believe they were leaving. My best and only friends were leaving for L.A- I suck at summaries but hopefully you'll like the story better. Read and Review please. Rated T just in case! SADLY DISCONTINUED!
1. Prologue

_**A/N: Hey Everyone! Okay so I found this accidently on my computer and I remember writing it while I was writing Summer Love. The idea had just popped up in my head and I just wrote it down. So I'll be posting this prologue as a test and if you like it, review and tell me so that I can try and write a second chapter okay? **_

_**This will be a small side project and I hope you like it :)**_

_**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing that has to do with Big Time Rush except my OC's.**_

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_**(At the Airport)**_

I looked at them as they stood prepared to leave. I had my arms crossed over my belly and refused to look at them. Why did they have to do this? Why now? Right when everything was working out for me. I suddenly felt someone embrace me. I looked up at the tall blond boy.

" Jessica. Please." He begged me. " Say something." He tried, but I just looked away.

" What should I say Kendall? My best friends tell me that they are leaving for L.A the same day that they are leaving." I felt tears sting in my eyes.

" We didn't know how to tell you." Carlos said putting his hand on my shoulder. Logan was next.

" We are really sorry we kept it from you. We should have told you." He said and I nodded.

" Yeah you should. That would have given me some time to prepare atleast." I mumbled and James walked up to me.

" Jessica-" He started but then stopped. We all looked at him expecting him to continue but he never did. He just opened his arms and hugged me tightly. Next Kendall joined our little hug and soon everyone was hugging. "-We are going to miss you." He said and with those words I broke down. I began to cry like I was going to die.

" Please don't cry." James said whiping away my tears.

" James I hate you for making me cry!" I said and smacked him chuckling. " And you Kendall! Stop begging me to react for God's sake! You already know how I feel about this." I turned to Logan and Carlos who took a step back afraid of what I would say. " Logan. Oh Logan. How am I going to survive math without you? And Carlos, who will I accidently crash into a car with now?" I asked and he chuckled.

" Yeah, that was fun." He said thinking about it. I looked at them raising my finger.

" Don't be sad." I said as I saw them tear up aswell.

" But you're crying." Logan said his voice breaking.

" Look. Just because I'm crying doesn't mean I'm not happy. You have a once in a lifetime oppurtunity and you should take this chance. We still have e-mail and we can text each other everyday and you need to keep me updated on everything you guys go through okay?" I told them and they nodded. " Now, get on that plane and rock L.A, Minnesota style!" I said and highfived them. We hugged once again and they boarded the plane. Kendall stopped for a second to look at me.

" Will you be okay Jess?" He asked me and I nodded whiping away my tears.

" Yeah." I said giving him a reasuring smile and he continued to walk into the plane. I waited until their plane lifted and then went to my mom who was waiting for me.

We drove home in silence. I didn't want to talk about anything. My best and _only_ friends were off to L.A and I was left alone. Who knew how long it would take before we got to see each other again. Who knew if they would even remember me in a year. I looked at myself in the mirror in my bathroom. My hair was messy, my clothes were wet from the rain and my glasses where dim. It was time for a change. No more geeky Jessica. No more depending on the four hockey players who were her only friends. I would go to school tomorrow, with a new look, a new attitude and a new life. Who knew, maybe in a year or two I would get the chance to meet my friends again.

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_**A/N: Okay so that was the prologue!**_

_**I know it's bad but bear with me okay? Review and tell me what you think and I'll try to make another chapter or so. Remember this isn't my main project so you'll have to wait longer for any updates.**_

_**Review please! That would mean the world to me! :)**_

_**Oh and one more thing, I changed Jessica's name like two times. First it was Marissa and then it was Alyssa but then I noticed that there already was a story with a girl named Alyssa so I changed it to Jessica and I'm sticking to Jessica so I'm sorry if anyone else has that name in a story because I'm really bad at coming up names okay?**_

**_Have a good day!_**

**_xoxo_**

**_Spicy_**


	2. Chapter 1

_**A/N: Okay I have been getting good reviews on this story and it really makes my day, so I decided to put up chapter one immediatly! :D**_

_**Yay! Remember this is just a side project and updates might not come so quickly.**_

_**If any of you who read myother story Summer Love read this, you should know that I'll be posting when I post Summer Trouble or The Girls Next Door on my profile. So check it out okay? I might put it up on Summer Love too if you want me to. PM me and tell me!**_

_**Now on with Chapter 1!**_

_**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing that has to do with Big Time Rush! I do however own Jessica and my other OC's in this story!**_

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_**(Jessica's Point of View)**_

_**Three years later... **_

_**LAX**_

I got into the cab quickly.

" Could you drive me to the Palm Woods?" I asked the taxi man and he nodded. It was really warm in L.A. I couldn't believe I was actually here. Three years ago, I would have never seen myself leaving Minnesota. Three years ago I hated L.A for taking my best friends from me and now, here I was. After the guys left I changed. My personallity didn't change _that_ much, just a little, while my looks had changed completely. They found out that I didn't need glasses anymore and my night braces where gone too. I had let my shoulder length hair grow and it now went almost down to my waist. I had lighter highlights in my naturally brown hair and had pierced my ears. I had changed. That was probably the only reason guys began to ask me out or even look twice at me. I was currently in a relationship with the most popular guy in school- _Jeremy Johnson_. We have been together for three months now and were actually happy. He never cheated on me or yelled or anything to make me upset. He was really sweet, not like in the movies where the popular guy is mean and a real jerk.

The way Jeremy and I got to know each other is another story and we can take that another time, when I'm ready to talk about it.

You are probably wondering what happened to Kendall, Carlos, Logan and James. Well, their dream came true. They became the new hit sensation _Big Time Rush. _We held contact for about a year, but then the phone calls became shorter and shorter, the e-mails stopped coming after a while and then everything stopped. I guessed they had forgotten about me. About a year ago I decided to write an e-mail to them and guess what I got back? A mail with them thanking me for supporting them. They thought I was some _fan. _That was when I decided to come to L.A and give them a piece of my mind. Well I didn't have any money at the time and decided to work at the local flower shop. One day I was just humming and singing to the radio when a talent scout heard me. She told me that she was looking for the new hit sensation and that she wanted to give me a chance. I gladly accepted and now here I am. On my way to the Palm Woods, _the home for the future famous. _

When I arrived the talent scout was waiting for me.

" Jessica." she said and kissed both if my cheeks.

" Kelly." I said excited. " So what now?" I asked her and she pinted to the building.

" You will be living here. Try to get to know some people and next week we'll start work okay?" She said and I nodded.

" Sounds cool." I said and she nodded.

" Great, next week you'll meet Gustavo. He'll be helping you and be your producer. You will be my first try to find a superstar so please don't dissapoint me." She begged and I nodded.

" I won't promise." I said and grabbed my suitcases and walked into the lobby. I walked up to the front desk and a chubby man popped up out of nowhere.

" Good Day Miss. I'm Mr. Bitters. Can I help you with something?" he asked me in a monotone voice, trying to act polite. I nodded.

" Kelly Wainright has booked a room for me." He clicked on something on the computer.

" Name?" He asked.

" Jessica Blake." I told him and he checked.

" Yeah. You have room 2K." He said sighing. I nodded and he showed me to it. I walked in and was shocked at what I saw. The apartment was amazing. A huge couch was in the middle of the livingroom and a 50' inch plasma tv was on the wall with all kinds of games. I looked at all of it in awe. The kitchen was amazing and modern as was the bedroom. I ran and hopped onto the king size bed laying down. Bitters looked at me and sighed.

" If you hear some crashing, breaking, crying or loud music and if your wall falls over, it's the boys next door." He said and gave me a fake smile. " Have a good stay at the Palm Woods." He said and walked out. As soon as he was out of the room I shrieked in happiness. I took out my phone and called Jeremy.

" _Hello?" _A tired voice said and I smiled.

" Jer? It's me Jessica." I said and heard him clear his throat.

" Jess_. Babe. How are things in L.A?" _He asked me and I looked around.

" Pretty good I guess. I just arrived here, but I miss you already." I said and he chuckled.

" _Well you know that I'm saving up money to come and visit you. Just remember to focus on your work and be a success." _He said supporting me as always.  
" I will. I have to go now. I'm on a mission of making new friends." I told him and he chuckled as we said good bye. I hung up and got up to get changed. I changed into a pair of black skinny jeans and a red blouse and black stilettos. I looked at my straightened hair and smiled. Yeah, I had to admit that changing was the best thing that could ever have happened to me. I picked up my sketch heft and walked out of my room locking it after me.

I walked down to the pool and sat down on a lounger looking around for inspiration. I looked at a palmtree and at some flowers under it and began to sketch it. When I had been sitting there for a while I heard the chair next to me move. I looked up and saw a guy with a guitar. He was smiling at me and I smiled back hesitatly.

" _New Girl-" _He began to sing. "-_New girl, sketching her way into every guys heart. Maybe she has a secret or maybe she just loves art." _I began to laugh.

" Yes I do love art and the secret part, I'm not telling you." I said in a sing song voice and he smiled. " I'm Jessica." I said offering him my hand but he stood up and walked away surprizing me even more. Suddenly a boy popped up from behind a bush. " Hey. Aren't you that kid from the juice commercial?" I asked and he nodded.

" I just want to be a kid but my mom want's me to be famous." He said just as a woman came running he quickly hid behind me.

" Tyler? Tyler? Have you seen my son? He was born to shine! A star! A star!" She said loudly and I pointed in the other direction as she began to run away. Tyler popped back up.

" Thanks." He said.

" No prob." I said and he fist bumped me. " I'm Jessica." I introduced myself " Who was that guy?" I asked pointing to the guy who had sung that song to me.

" Guitar dude. He's a song writer." Tyler told me. Guitar dude waved at me and I waved back slightly.

" Okay. Well it was nice meeting-" I was interuppted by loud cheers. I looked over to the entrance and felt my heart stop and my body freeze. "-Oh My God!" I yelped and fell of my chair. Tyler looked at me weirdly. It felt like everyone was staring at me. I slowly looked up from behind the bush and gave them all a small smile. " Sorry!" I said getting up and taking my sketch heft. " New here! Fell off the chair." I mumbled and quickly walked off to the smoothie stand. Behind me I heard some yelling, sounding like " She will be mine!" but I guess I was just imgining things. Or that was what I thought before I was surrounded by the boys I was trying to avoid.

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**_A/N: Ohhhh! what do you think will happen now? Will they recognize her or not? Well anyway sorry for the minor cliffy._**

**_Review and tell me if you want the next chapter and what you thought of this one! =)_**

**_xoxo_**

**_Spicy_**


	3. Chapter 2

_**A/N: Okay so I have been getting some reviews on this story and I am feeling so inspired so I decided to put up another chapter! :D**_

_**Maybe this story won't just be a side story after all. Okay I'm making it official: This story is from now on one of my main projects! [insert applause here... No? Not even a clap? Oh well I tried...]**_

_**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing that ha to do with Big Time Rush. I just own my OC.**_

_**Oh and one more thing before you start. One of you who reviewed said that Logan would remember her, but just keep in mind that it has been three years and she has changed really really much!**_

_**On with the story now!**_

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I sat there silently trying to avoid looking at them. Of course the pretty boy would be first to speak.

" Hi. I'm Ja-"

" James." I interruppted. " I know." I said still not looking at them. I could imagine his face right now. Either he was thinking I was a psychic or I was a fan.

" I'm in a band." He continued to flirt. " Maybe you've heard of us. We're Big Time-"

" Rush. Yeah I know." I said, interruppting him again. Now I was guessing Kendall would come in and save the day like always.

" James. Stop bothering her. She obviously knows who you are." Yep. Deffinitly Kendall. He put out his hand towards me to shake. " I'm-"

" Kendall." I finished again ignoring his hand. I could feel them get frustrated. I knew they were going to test me or something and was just waiting for them.

" I'm-"

" Logan. Like I said, I _know. _And you are Carlos so don't even try." I said and I could just imagine Carlos' face drop when he realized that he didn't have a chance.

" So you've heard of us?" James asked and I nodded.

" Yep. Deffinitly heard of you." I said and I imagined their faces lighting up.

" And you're a fan?" James asked me playing with his hand on the bar table.

" Nope." I said popping the p. I heard James yelp as if someone had slapped him. I finally turned around in my chair to face them. No one reacted. I guessed that they didn't recognize me. I at least hoped Logan would but no, and that just made me angrier. " Listen. I don't want to hear from either of you." I said harshly. I turned to James. " I don't _care _that you're in a band." I said and turned to Logan. " I don't _care _how smart you are." I said and turned to Carlos. " I don't _want _to know what stunts you have pulled that are putting your life in danger." I told him, knowing that he had probably done something stupid. I finally turned to Kendall. At first I didn't know what to tell him. We had practically grown up together and then he just left and I never heard of him. I got up taking my sketch heft. " And I don't want to talk to people who leave their best friends and forget them even if they promise to write." I said and turned on my heel and walked away leaving them stunned. I walked up to my apartment, ignoring the looks some people were giving me.

When I got to my room I couldn't help it but I felt a tear run down my cheek. My God. I had missed them so much. I thought I was mad at them but I had no idea why I just wanted to jump up on Carlos' back, mess up James' hair, have a complicated math conversation with Logan or just sit and talk with Kendall. The way thy had looked at me, confused. I couldn't believe they had forgotten about me. I layed down in my bed and began to remember our times together.

_I was sitting under the big tree on the school yard when I heard laughing. I looked up to see Kendall, Carlos, James and Logan approaching. They took one glance at me and practically ran up to me. _

" _Jessica__! You have to hear this story! It's hilarious!" James manages to say through laughs. I smiled at them._

" _Do I really want to risk dying from laughter because it seems to me that Carlos is." I stated and pointed to Carlos who was on the ground, clutching his sides in laughter. Kendall chuckled and our eyes met for a second._

" _Oh trust me you do." He said smiling at me, just as it began to thunder. **Wait what? Thunder?**_

I opened my eyes and heard laughing from next door and something hitting the wall. I stared at the wall trying to make the noice stop, but it never did. It just got louder and louder until the picture that was handing on the wall fell down and the glass shattered. I stod up, angry, and walked out of my apartment. I walked up to their door and knocked furiously and after a fiew seconds the banging stopped. I heard some faint mumbles and knocked again. The doors slowly opened and I looked up at the person ready to yell at him or her but stopped dead in my tracks.

" Are you kidding me?" I said in a low voice. Kendall stared at me with his olive eyes and I couldn't tear myself away from his look.

" Hey, your the girl from the pool." He stated in a low voice and suddenly the others where behind him trying to get a look at me. James leaned against the door frame giving me a charming smile.

" Couldn't stay away could you?" He said and I raised an eyebrow.

" Are you kidding me?" I asked louder this time. Kendall pushed James away and squinted his eyes at me.

" You look familiar." He said looking at me from top to toe. I crossed my arms and glared at him. His eyes slowly widend as he began to realize who I was. " No. It can't be." He mumbled and whispered something to Logan who's eyes widend too. The two of them began to whisper frantically and pointed at me on occasion until I finally had enough.

" Look. Can you please just calm down a little? You knocked my painting off the wall." I told them but they continued to stare at me. " What?" I snapped at them and Kendall finally spoke.

" What's your name?" He asked me and I felt like someone punched me in the stomach.

" Uh... I-" I began but hesitated. They looked at me like lost puppies, waiting desperatly for an answer. " Jessica. Jessica Blake." I finally answered and their expression changed from confused, to understanding, to happy but then finally settled on surprized.

" Jessica." Kendall said and stepped forward looking at me like I was some new thing that he had never seen in his life. " Is it really you?" He asked me and I sighed and nodded. He smiled widely at me and embraced me in a big hug, starteling me. James was still confused but then realized who I was.

" Oh my God!" He exclaimed and joined our hug quickly. Logan was next and then finally Carlos too understood what was going on. I didn't know what to say or do. I wanted to yell at them, I wanted to hug them, I wanted everything. They slowly pulled away but Kendall didn't let go at first. He grabbed my shoulders.

" What are you doing here?" He asked me almost crying with happiness. I just blinked once, not knowing what to say. I shook him off and he looked at me confused as I backed away.

" I didn't come here to see you." I said and they looked at me confused. " I don't ever want to see you again. Just stay away from me okay?" I said and walked back into my apartment and locked the door after me. I leaned my back against the door and slid down to the floor, finally understanding that there is no way that they were going to stay away from me now.

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**_A/N: Yay! They know who she is! :D_**

**_ And she was soooooo mean to them! :( I made her act like a real- well you get the point. Please don't be mad at me! I swear things will get better (and complicated)! Moahahaha! I'm the only one that knows what will happen next and it makes me feel so powerful! *_* Okay my craz moment is over now. _**

**_Please review and tell me what you think. Tell me if you want the story to continue and what you hope will happen! :P I might put in some of your ideas in the story =)._**

**_Thank you to all of you who have reviewed and to those who read this story! _**

**_xoxo_**

**_Spicy_**


	4. Chapter 3

_**A/N: Okay so this is a little short but I wanted to give you guys a small treat because of the reviews I got on last chapter :)**_

_**This is from Kendall's point of view and some chapters will be in his and others in Jessica's just thought you should know! Now I'll just put this up for you and then go to sleep! ;)**_

_**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing! Just Jessica.**_

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_**(Kendall's Point of View)**_

I closed the door after watching Jessica go into her own apartment. I turned to the guys, who were still pretty shook up.

" I can't believe it." Logan mumbled loud enough for us to hear. " It was really her. Jessica. Jess. Our friend." He continued until James smacked his head.

" Get a grip man." James said and Logan just glared at walked over to the couch and sat down. " Now, what are we going to do about it?" James asked and I sighed looking at him.

" Do about what?" I asked and he shrugged.

" Jess seems mad at us for some reason." He stated and I rolled my eyes.

" Obviously since she told us to stay away from her." I said and Carlos looked at us.

" But we aren't going to do that are we?" He asked. " Right guys?" He said and I thought about it.

" No. We are going to make her our friend again." I told them and Carlos let out a sigh of relief.

" But what did we do?" Logan asked thinking about it. I thought about it too. _We left her, alone. _

" We left her alone in Minnesota?" I suggested what I was thinking.

" Yeah but she told us that she wasn't mad at us for that. She wanted us to come to L.A and be a success." James said and we began to think about it.

" And in her letters she told us that she made new friends-" Carlos began but I stopped him standing up.

" That's it!" I exclaimed and made them all jump. " Her letters. We stopped writing! That was what she was talking about by the pool! About best friends leaving and promising to write!" It made much more sense right now.

" But what if it's not that? Maybe something happened back in Minnesota?" Logan said and I sat down again.

" Then I guess we'll just have to find out what the problem is." I said smugly and they leaned closer.

" You have a plan don't you?" Carlos said excited. I nodded smirking.

" It's GJTBOFAODT!" I said and they looked at me confused.

" Gatbof-what now?" Logan asked and I rolled my eyes.

" _Get Jess To Be Our Friend Again Or Die Trying._" I said and Carlos gulped.

" Are you serious about the _die trying _part?" He asked and I nodded.

" We will wellcome her to Palm Woods and keep spending time with her even if she tells us to leave. So from now on when the words _leave, stay away, get lost _or anything that has to do with us leaving her alone comes out of her mouth- we ignore it!" I said and they nodded understanding. I put my hand out for them. " Are you in or out?" I asked not really giving them a choice. James was first to put his hand on mine. Figures, James and Jess were always close- brother and sister close.

" I'm in." he said and I nodded. I looked at Carlos and Logan.

" Well?" I asked them and Carlos bit his lip.

" I still don't like the dying part but yeah- I'm in." He said and put his hand on top of James'. We looked at Logan who sighed.

" In." He said and put his hand on Carlos'. I grinned at them.

" Then lets get Jess to be our friend again!" I said and we lifted our hands in the air and highfived. I looked at the watch. " I guess it's a little late for that now, but we'll start tomorrow!" I said and they nodded as we headed back to bed. James stopped for a second.

" She had really changed." He stated and I nodded, thinking about the way her eyes had glistened when we realized who she was.

" I know." I said and he walked back into his room. If Katie and mom where here they would probably have told us to leave her alone until she calmed down. But they weren't! They were on a cruise! Ha! What do you say about that now?_ Okay I'm officially nuts, _I thought and went to bed. Surprizingly I dreamt of big brown eyes and a smile that I had left behind in Minnesota, three years ago...

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_**A/N: Okay so I couldn't let the guys just leave her alone! :) What would be the fun of that? Hahaha! Well tell me what you thought and please I'm sorry for any misspellings. I should've been in bed an hour ago :D I'm just a bad bad girl ;)**_

_**xoxo**_

_**Spicy**_


	5. Chapter 4

_**A/N: Okay so I'm here with another chapter! :P Yay!**_

_**In this chapter you get to find out more about the relationships the guys had with Jessica before they left Minnesota. I hope you like it =) I want to know what you think of Jessica's relationship with them and which one you think is the best? I'm just curious.**_

_**Oh and I know Jessica is a little harsh now in the beginning but trust me it get's better! :) Just bear with me.**_

_**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing that has to do with Big Time Rush! I just own my OC Jessica Blake.**_

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_**(Jessica's Point of View)**_

Okay, so yesterday the guys found out who I was. We shared a moment but that was just a spur of the moment. Everything will change today. I don't want to see or talk to them and I know I might sound mean but you don't know what I went through in those three years! Let's just put it this way, it took me almost two months to get someone to talk to me in school and surprizingly, that was a boy I never even liked or talked to. Infact the guys and I used to hate him because of his partying ways and drinking. Let's just say that it ended badly and someone was hurt, but that led to me and Jeremy beginning to hang out more. We talked more on breaks and soon became friends. Friends turned to best friends and soon we began to fall for each other and three months ago we began to date and officially became a couple. I know it doesn't sound so bad but trust me, it was at first. I guess I just never got over the guys leaving me in Minnesota. Jeremy understood that and he supported me and that is just one of the many reasons why I began to like him, the other reasons we can take another time. I began to think through how the guys and I where back in Minnesota.

James was always like a big brother to me, even if he was just a fiew months older then me. While all the girl's where crushing on him, he would always ask me if I thought she was okay to date. He told me my opinion mattered and that I was one of his best friends. I used to ask him why he didn't ask the guys and he would reply with a simple " You're a girl. You know better. They just look at her and say if she's hot or not". Okay so maybe that wasn't a simple answer but you get the point.

Carlos, the daredevil. I was always one of the calmest in our small group but when he encouraged me into doing something really daring I usually did it. Once I almost got hit by a buss because of him but we laughed it off. That was before we got hit by a car together and had to go to the hospital. The car didn't drive fast! It almost stopped completely, so it wasn't any _real _danger. Mrs Knight had freaked out completely when she got the call from my mom. Good times.

Logan. Well Logan was different then both Carlos and James. He treated me like he would treat any guy friend but was a little bit more careful around me. He was actually my math tutor since sixth grade. What can I say? I stunk (and still stink) at math! Let's say that while Carlos was the devil on my shoulder, Logan was the angel. He tried to reason with me all the time and stop me from jumping off the garage roof when the snow was two meters high and hard as stone. I didn't listen to him that time and broke my arm. I still have a small scar from the stitches and I'm still as proud of it as I was then.

Kendall, oh Kendall. How will I ever explain our relationship? We where complicated. We had practically grown up together and he was the one to introduce me to the others. I has always felt differently about Kendall. At first the other three where just my _friends _while he was my _best friend. _I know this sounds oh so cliché but I did have a small crush on him once. It was when he saved me from a wasp in third grade. I had never been more afraid in my life (-so far. Of course the worst thing I ever been through was almost getting hit by a bus later). He had grabbed my hand and run with me to the school fountain and jumped in with me. We didn't even have spare clothes! But it was worth it he said. When Kendall got his first girlfriend I had been upset at first but then he broke up with her because she didn't want him to hang out with me. I later realized that Kendall and I were just friends and that was all we would ever be, so I got over him.

I've heard the whole, feelings like that don't just go away, but trust me- they do and they did. I have absolutely no feeling left for him whatsoever! I mean even if I did, I was together with Jeremy. We loved each other or at least thats what I think. We never really said it but I knew we both felt it.

I was walking down to the pool again. I had decided that even if I couldn't avoid seeing the boys I would try my best to ignore them. But I knew how they where and I know how they are. They don't give up so easily but I had to stay strong!

I sat down on a lounger with my sketch heft and began to draw Jeremy's face as I remembered it. The only problem was that in the end it changed. The eyebrows got bigger and the nose had a different shape. The eyes weren't dark as Jeremy's but bright- almost olive even if I didn't draw with colors. I looked at the image and scrowled. It wasn't Jeremy at all! It was Kendall! I was just about to rip the page away when I heard some laughing by the pool. I looked up and saw the guys coming closer to me. James and Kendall where wearing shorts and tanks while Carlos and Logan where wearing t-shirts instead of tanks. James had really gotten into shape. His muscles where big and I could practically see his washboard abs. He had them when he left for L.A too but this was a little bit more. I glanced at the others and they seemed to be in good shape too. I guess all that dancing paid off after all. I looked down at my heft again and closed it so that they wouldn't see the picture.

" Jessica!" James said and sat down on the lounger next to me. I didn't look at him I just looked froward.

" Go away." I said as the others sat down close to me.

" So I was thinking maybe we could catch up or something." He continued as if he hadn't heard me.

" Didn't you hear me?" I asked and he nodded once and kept talking.

" So, how long will you be staying here?" He asked casually. Wow he had no idea.

" Not long if you keep ignoring my request." I said and stood up walking away. I stopped and turned around. " Leave me alone." I said when I saw that they had gotten up to follow me. They just lept walking until they stood in front of me.

" So how about we show you around?" Carlos suggested.

" Yeah I mean, you don't really know anyone else here." Logan said and I raised an eyebrow.

" Tyler!" I called with my arms still crossed across my chest. The little redhead turned up behind me in less then a second.

" Yes Jessica?" He asked me politely.

" Can you show me around sometime?" I asked and he nodded excitedly.

" Yeah sure. Just call for me and-"

" Tyler Tyler!" His mom called and he looked at me scared.

" I have to run now. Later guys!" He said and dissapeared.

" Bye Tyler." The guys said and waved after him.

" Okay so maybe you know like _one _person." Logan said just as Guitar Dude turned up out of nowhere.

" Jessica! Could you hold my guitar for a second?" He asked me and I nodded.

" Sure." I took the guitar from him as he ran into the lobby and then quickly returned with a guitar case. I handed him the guitar and he smiled.

" Thank's I owe ya." He said winking and walking away. I looked at the guys, smiled smugly and walked away towards the elevator. Just as the door closed I waved at them slightly in victory. I sighed deeply. They wouldn't let me be alone, I just knew it. The elevator door opened and I was just about to walk out when a person turned up right in front of me. I jumped in surprize only to jump into another person behind me. I turned around and glared at the person, realizing who it was.

" How did you get up here so fast?" I asked Kendall as he quirked an eyebrow.

" The stairs are faster in this place." He said and winked. " That's just one inside tip." I turned around to walk away but once again knocked into James, the first person who had stood in my way. I grabbed his shoulders and walked around him, turning him in the process and then ran towards my apartment. I could hear their footsteps getting closer but finally managed to get to my door and unlocked the door quickly. I walked in and locked it behind me.

_These guys are insane. **That's why you love them.**_ _No I don't! **Stop trying to deny it! You've missed them! **Maybe I have- just a little! **Yeah right, that's why you drew Kendall's face and not your boyfriends. **I hate you. **Well I'm you so that just means you hate yourself! **I need to stop these conversations in my head. **Your right- I mean ****we're**** right! **Well we're going crazy!_

I shook my head trying to get the thoughts out of it. I sighed realizing I really was going crazy. Now what could I do to clear my head? The Gym.

I changed into a shortsleeved _Nike _T-shirt and a pair of shorts. I put my hair up in a hig ponytail and tied a bandana on my forehead. The bandana part was actually something I got from James when we worked out together one time. It has kind of become an obsession of mine. It made me feel dangerous in a cool way. I put on my _Nike _basketball shoes and slowly opened the apartment door. I looked around and grabbed my bag with my normal clothes in it and slowly walked out making sure not to make a sound. I walked towards the gym (I had seen a sign on my way in!) and put my bag in the locker room. I quickly walked to the training room and shrieked when I opened the door.

" Hi Jess! Thought you might want some training partners!" Kendall beamed. I felt like I had been slapped.

" Cool bandana!" James said checking it out. I just stared at them. I wanted this workout to be just me! Not with _them._ I had to get rid of them somehow.

" How did you know where I was?" I asked them, genuinly curious. " I didn't make a sound when I got out of the apartment." I said and they smiled in triumph.

" Well we were actually waiting in the lobby. So when you walked down we saw you head towards the gym and quickly went to change and then got back here before you got out of the locker room!" Carlos said in one breath. Impressive, I had to admit that.

" Well-this is _not _an invite by the way-" I said and then continued. "-you can stay since it's not my gym. But I will not be talking to you." I said and walked over to the running machine and began to jog slowly ignoring them.

* * *

_**A/N: Okay so what did you think? And don't forget to answer my question:**_

_**Which relationship (from back in Minnesota) did you like the most? She cared about them the same but like I described it they had different roles in her life. So what do you say? Tell me in a review! =)**_

_**Thank you for reading so far!**_

_**xoxo**_

_**Spicy**_


	6. Chapter 5

_**A/N: Hey Everyone! Okay So I have a problem. My mom thinks I'm getting a computer addiction and she said I can't use the computer in five days! :O I know! Well anyway, the punnishment started two days ago but since I have been doing so good I was allowed twenty minutes on the computer! Yay! So I'm updating my stories right now and hopefully you'll understand and can wait for my updates. I won't be on the computer as much because school will start soon and so on and I have to prepare mentally! (haha I hate it). So that was it I guess.**_

_**To this story now. This chapter is a little short but it's kind of just a filler and I know Jessica is harsh on them but trust me, you'll understand it later on in the story. **_

_**Hope you enjoy this chapter!**_

**_DISCLAIMER: I own nothing that has to do with Big Time Rush!_**

* * *

_**(Kendall's Point of View)**_

Okay, so she wanted to play that way? We watched her as she walked to the running machine and began to jog softly. Carlos looked at me and I nodded mouthing " Don't give up". He put his helmet on and ran up in front of her.

" So Jessica." He said casually. She didn't respond. " I was thinking that uhm..." I could see he couldn't come up with something so I ran up to her aswell. Then I noticed why Carlos couldn't say anything. She looked _amazing_. She had that determined look in her eyes with a sparkle and you couldn't really help but get lost in them. I had never noticed what shade her brown eyes really had. They seemed to be pools of chocolate that you just wanted to drown in. _Okay, that sounded weird. __**Yeah, you should really stop staring at her. **__I know but she really looks good! __**You never thought she looked good before? **__I never thought of her that way. __**So you never looked twice at her? **__No and I'm beginning to regret it now. __**You sound so shallow! You're just looking at her because she's hot! **__What? Psh! I never said she was hot! __**I'm you remember? I can hear every single thought you think? Gosh your stupid. **__So are you because you just called yourself stupid! __**You mean **__**we**__** called **__**us**__** stupid! **__I'm stopping this madness right now._

I smiled at her when she raised an eyebrow at me.

" We just wanted to tell you that we're sorry for making you leave the pool. We know how much we loved that pool when we first got here, so we don't want you to miss the opputunity of swimming in it." I said and she turned the machine off. I could tell that she was about to speak because she opened her mouth but quickly shut it and cleared her throat and then walked over to the exercise bike. She sat down and I looked at James and Logan who nodded. They sat down on the bikes on either side of her.

" So Jess. What have you been up to in Minnesota?" Logan asked. She just cleared her throat again and I could tell she was struggling to keep quiet. She was always a real talker. Well atleast when she was talking to people she knew.

" Or even better! Why are you here in California?" James asked and she got off the bike. She looked at us for a moment and James spoke again. " Maybe we should go for coffee sometime, all of us- for old times sake." I could see her blood boiling. She had had enough.

" You know what?" She exploded. " I've had enough!" _Told you._ " You four are so-so-" She said trying to think of a word.

" Funny?" Carlos suggested.

" Smart?" Logan said next.

" _Hot?_" James asked and I was just about to say something when she spoke.

" Juvenile!" She said and I chuckled but stopped when she glared at me darkly. " I am sick and tired of you trying to be my friends again. Just leave me alone already! I don't _need _you anymore!" The words really stung to my heart. Not just my heart, probably the others too. " So just stay_-the hell-_awayfrom me!" She said and walked away. We stared after her shocked. She had never used a word like that before. We could tell that she was serious so we would probably leave her alone for today. The three guys looked at me.

" Now what?" Logan asked and I smirked.

" Leave her. Tomorrow is a new day." I said and smirked, knowing that it would only be a matter of time before she forgave us.

* * *

_**A/N: Okay so I hope you liked it! I'll try and 'deserve' more time on the computer and update as soon as I can. Oops my twenty minutes are almost up now. I gotta go before my mom gets here! Haha I'm just kidding she's not that bad and I love her! :P**_

_**Have a good day and I'll try to update as soon as I can!**_

_**xoxo**_

_**Spicy**_


	7. Chapter 6

_**A/N: Hi everyone! I'm sorry for making you wait so long for this chapter but if you read the a/n on my last one you know why. So this chapter is a little longer then the other ones. That is probably because there are some lyrics in this one. I hope you like it though.**_

_**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Big Time Rush or the song used in this chapter (Trainwreck by Demi Lovato).**_

* * *

_**(Jessica's Point of View)**_

The rest of the week passed quickly. It didn't pass a day without the boys trying to get me to talk to them. I could ignore them for a while but then, sooner or later I would give up and just tell them to stay away. It just didn't seem to be able to pass their thick skulls.

The sunlight filled my room in the morning just as my clock began the beep. I turned it off groaning and got out of bed. I hate early mornings. I quickly got into the shower. The warm water was running down my body when my phone began to ring. I ignored it finishing my shower and then walked out of it with a towel wrapped around me. I walked up to the phone and checked my answering machine.

" _Good Morning Jessica. This is Kelly. Could you please come by to Rocque Records around ten? You don't have to stress but please be there, my boss is waiting for you. Thanks Bye!"_ I turned it off and walked over to my closet and picked out something to wear. I put on a pair of washed out jeans and a white t-shirt and my white converse. I looked at myself in the mirror.

My straightened hair was let out and I quickly applied some lipgloss. I never was one for make-up but a little lipgloss here and there didn't hurt much. I put on my shades and checked my watch. 09.30. I decided to leave since I didn't have anything to do anyway. I grabbed my bag with my sketch heft, wallet and other things I might need incase something happened and walked out of the apartment. As I passed the boys apartment I couldn't hear a single sound and expected them to be either asleep or down by the pool.

I was walking outside when I heard my name being called. I turned around and saw four boys running at me with high speed. They knocked into me and I groaned as I hit the floor. I felt some kind of pressure on me and opened my eyes to meet Kendall's olive green ones. He smiled at me cheepishly and I glared at him.

" What part of 'stay away' don't you get?" I asked as they got up from the ground.

" I think it's the _away _part." Carlos said and Logan shook his head.

" No I vote _stay." _He said and I tried hard not to laugh but couldn't help but crack a smile. James offered me his hand and helped me up. I brushed off my jeans and they looked at me.

" You have changed." Logan stated the obvious.

" Yeah, I'm not a dork anymore." I said and Carlos shook his head at me.

" You where never a dork." He told me and I put my hand up.

" No. Stop doing that!" I said and they looked at me confused.

" We aren't doing any-" Kendall began but I cut him off.

" Yes you are. " I snapped. " You are being all nice and expect me to forgive you just like that." I said and they just looked at me confused.

" What did we do Jessica? You can't just show up here and be all mad at us for nothing!" James said and I snorted at him.

" You don't know what you did?" I asked them and they shook their heads. " I'll tell you what you did. You forgot about me!" I said and began to walk away but felt a sharp pain in my ankle. I gasped in pain and almost fell over but they quickly caught me. " Let go off me!" I ordered and shrugged them off trying to walk again but with the same result. I winced and they caught me again.

" Are you alright Jess?" Logan asked concerned. I shook my head.

" I can't walk and I need to get to Rocque Records before ten! No I'm not okay!"I almost yelled at him and he nodded.

" It's normal for people to act angry when they have hurt themselves. Then comes-"

" I did not hurt myself!" I said interuppting him.

" -denial." He finished in victory.

" But I didn't. It was you four that hurt me!" I exclaimed and he did a fake check in the air.

" Blaming others." I wanted to pounce him right now and trust me I tried but Kendall and James held me back.

" I need to go to work!" I said and Logan nodded but then looked at me confused.

" At Rocque Records?" he asked and I nodded.

" Yes. Kelly is waiting for me there. I am supposed to meet her boss and I'm going to be late if I don't go there now." They all looked at Logan as he put his hand to his cheek thinking about something.

" We can drive you there." He suggested and my jaw dropped.

" Didn't you hear me when I said that I wanted you to stay away from me?" I asked and he shrugged at me.

" We did, we just don't care. Besides we can't just leave you with that ankle of yours now can we?" He asked and I looked away.

" You could leave for L.A without telling me first..." I muttered and I felt Kendall and James stiffen as they held me. They probably heard me but I couldn't care less. I turned back to Logan. " Fine. Just drive me there and then leave. I don't want anything to do with you guys anymore." I said and he nodded.

" We can discuss that while we drive." He said as he and Carlos took the lead with Kendall, James and me following them to the car. They put me in the backseat and James and Kendall sat on either side of me, while Carlos sat shotgun and Logan drove. We were sitting in a awkward silence when my cell phone suddenly rang. I quickly looked at the caller id and smiled answering.

" Hello." I said as Kendall and James looked at me.

" _Jessica! Baby!" _Jeremy's voice rang through the phone. " _How are things going?" _He asked me and I smiled ignoring James and Kendall's stares.

" I'm on my way to work right now but everything is fine I guess. Aren't you at work?" I asked him looking out the window.

" _Well I have the flu and decided to stay home today. I just needed to hear your voice to make me feel a little better." _I smiled.

" Aww... Poor baby." I said and earned weird looks from the boys. I stuck my tounge out at them and continued to talk to Jeremy. " Tell my mom I said hi okay? I need to go now. Hope you get better soon." I said and heard him chuckle on the other line.

" _Yeah I will. I love you Jess." _He said and I was startled at first. We had never said that to each other before. I smiled.

" I love you too Jer." I said and we hung up. I put away to see the four boys gaping at me. " What now?" I asked annoyed and they shut their mouths.

" Nothing." Kendall muttered and got out of the car slamming the door behind him. He walked over to the other side and waited for James to help me out and then grabbed my other arm and held me up. Carlos got out of the car and Logan locked it after them. Kendall's grip tightened slightly on my arm but I ignored him. They helped me to the elevator and I leaned against the wall for support as Kendall glared at me. James whisteled awkwardly and Logan was texting while Carlos looked at me.

" So who's _Jer_?" Carlos said, asking what everyone was wondering.

" My boyfriend." I said and Logan almost dropped his phone.

" You have a _boyfriend!_?" Kendall asked as if it was crazy and I turned to him.

" Yes. Didn't you think I could get one or what?" I asked and he quickly shook his head.

" No it's just that I'm surprized. You never told us you like anyone when we were back in Minnesota." He explained and I sighed deeply.

" Well that was then and now is now. Jeremy and I have been together for three months now and I'm happy so just let it go." I said and he gaped at me.

" Wait Jeremy as in _Jeremy Johnson?" _He asked and I nodded. " Your dating a jock?" He said and I nodded again.

" Woah. I thought you hated him." James said and I nodded.

" I did but then I changed my mind." I said and Kendall snorted.

" And now you _love _him." He said simply. I was just about to begin a argument with him when the elevator doors opened. Kelly stood there and watched me limb forward with Kendall's and James' help.

" What happened?" She asked me and I tilted my head motioning to the guys.

" _They _happened." I said and she shook her head.

" Kendall didn't I tell you guys not to hurt anyone else?" She asked him and I looked at her.

" Wait you guys know each other?" I asked and they nodded.

" We kind of work for Gustavo." Logan said and I rolled my eyes.

" Of course. Your boss is _my _boss." I said and they all nodded.

" Well Jessica, you need to sing right now because Gustavo is waiting for you in the recording studio.

" Woah Woah wait." Carlos said and looked at me. " You sing?" He asked and I just nodded.  
" Yes. Now help me to the recording studio before I get fired." I said and they did as I told them and surprisingly didn't ask any more questions. Kelly set up a chair for me so that I could sit and handed me the lyrics to the song.

" I know you haven't praciticed yet, but do your best and try to ignore us standing behind the glass window. Besides it's your song so you should know it." She told me and I nodded preparing myself as the music started.

" _La dee da, yeah_

__

You fled from medication  
'Cause it only causes pain  
You won't go to the doctor  
He keeps calling you insane  
You're lost even when  
You're going the right way  
You mean the world to me  
Even though you might be crazy

And you said we wouldn't make it  
But look how far we've come  
For so long, my heart was breaking  
But now we're standing strong  
The things you say  
Make me fall harder each day  
You're a trainwreck  
But I wouldn't love you if you changed  
No, oh, yeah

I shook your hand  
And you pulled it right away, yeah  
You asked me to dance  
Instead, I said, "No way"  
Inside I was dying to give it a try  
And you begged me so I stayed  
I knew you were different  
From the way I caved

_And you said we wouldn't make it  
But look how far we've come  
For so long, my heart was breaking  
But now we're standing strong  
The things you say  
__You make me fall harder each day  
You're a trainwreck  
But I wouldn't love you if you changed, yeah  
No, oh, yeah_

_We were so different  
__But opposites attract  
__So my hope kept growing  
And I never looked back  
You're one of a kind  
No one can change this heart of mine, oh_

__

And you said we wouldn't make it  
But look how far we've come  
For so long, my heart was breaking  
And now we're standing strong  
The things you say  
You make me fall harder each day  
You're a trainwreck  
But I wouldn't love you if you changed

_One more thing I thought I'd share  
With someone special  
I'm falling like I've never fell before  
It's funny you said we'd never make it  
And look how far we've come  
You're a trainwreck  
But with you, I'm in love"_

The music faded and I looked at Kelly who gave me a thumbs up from behind a man with bug-eye glasses. I noticed that the guys where still there and they seemed surprized or rather shocked. I slowly got up from the chair and limbed to the door and walked out of the recording booth. The man in the chair turned around to face me. He offered me his hand.

" Gustavo Rocque." He said and smiled as I shook it. " Welcome to Rocque Records." He said and I smiled widely.

" Oh My Gosh Really?" I asked excited and he nodded I turned to the first person and hugged him. I looked up to see Kendall staring down at me and I quickly let go of him. " Sorry." I mumbled.

" It's okay Jess." He said and smiled slightly. That made me realize something. Maybe I wasn't mad at them after all. Maybe this was a chance for us to make everything right? Maybe we could all be friends if we just talked things through. Maybe...

* * *

_**A/N: So what did you think of this chapter? Do you think this story is good or should I give up on it? I'm actually having some trouble writing it and so on but what do you think?**_

_**The next chapter will be the same as this one but from KENDALL'S POINT OF VIEW! That will be happening in some of the chapters. I mean that I'll write one from Jessica's and one from Kendall's.**_

_**Oh and I start school soon but I'll try and make time to write and update! :P**_

**_'Til Next Time!_**

**_xoxo_**

**_Spicy_**


	8. Chapter 7

_**A/N: Okay so I didn't want to leave you guys wondering what Kendall was thinking during the last chapter for long, so here is chapter 7 (which is really chapter 6 from Kendall's point of view!). I hope you like it enough to review. =)**_

_**DISCLAIMER: I don't own Big Time Rush or the song used in this chapter okay! :I**_

* * *

_**(Kendall's Point of View)**_

The whole week we tried to get Jessica to talk and spend more time with us. The only problem was that she refused to. The day would start with her ignoring us but in the end she would tell us to stay away and leave her alone. Of course we would ignore her and try again the next day.

So today we had pretty much planned to do the same. We woke up early and got dressed and just waited for Jessica to come out of her apartment. We where eating breakfast when we heard her door open. We only looked at each other and knew it was showtime. We opened the door and just saw the elevator doors close and then we knew it was her. We quickly took the stairs and waited for her to exit the elevator. We heard a faint ding, and she walked out. She was wearing faded jeans, a white t-shirt and a pair of white converse. She looked really good in her shades too. Just when she was about to walk out of the building I called her name.

" Jessica!" We began to run towards her and then everything went fast. She turned around and just as I was about to stop in front of her, someone (I think Carlos) pushed me forward and then we all fell to the ground like bowling pins. Typically, in a cliché way, I fell on top of her. She groaned at the impact and slowly opened her eyes only to get a surprized look when she looked right into mine. I got this weird feeling in my stomach. Something bubbly and if felt kind of nice. I smiled at her while she glared.

" What part of '_stay away'_ don't you get?" She asked as we got off the ground (and I off of her).

" I think it's the _away_ part." Carlos said joking like always. Logan shook his head at me.

" No I vote _stay._" He said and I saw Jessica crack a smile. James offered her his hand and helped her up. She brushed off her jeans and looked at us as we watched her carefully.

" You have changed." Logan said, taking the words out of my mouth. She nodded .

" Yeah I'm not a dork anymore." She said putting herself down. Carlos shook his head.

" You were never a dork." He told her and she put her hand up.

" No. Stop doing that!" she said and we looked at her confused.

" We aren't doing any-" I began but she interruppted me.

" Yes you are!" She snapped at me. " You are being all nice and expect me to forgive you just like that." She said and we looked at her confused.

" What did we do Jessica? You can't just show up here and be all mad at us for nothing!" James said and she snorted at him.

" You don't know what you did?" She asked us and we shook our heads. " I'll tell you what you did. You forgot about me!" She said and began to walk away but gasped in pain and almost fell over. James and I quickly caught her before she hit the ground again. " Let go off me!" She ordered us and shrugged us off and tried to walk again but with the same result. She winced and we caught her again.

" Are you alright Jess?" Logan asked concerned and she shook her head.

" I can't walk and I need to get to Rocque Records before ten! No I'm not okay!" She almost yelled at Logan who just nodded.

" It's normal for people to act angry when they have hurt themselves. Then comes-"

" I did not hurt myself!" She said interuppting him.

" -denial." He finished in victory.

" But I didn't. It was you four that hurt me!" She exclaimed and he did a fake check in the air.

" Blaming others." She looked like she wanted to jump up at him and beat him to death but James and I held her back.

" I need to go to work!" She said and Logan nodded but then we all looked at her confused..

" At Rocque Records?" he asked her and she nodded.

" Yes. Kelly is waiting for me there. I am supposed to meet her boss and I'm going to be late if I don't go there now." We all looked at Logan as he put his hand to his cheek thinking about what we could do in this situation.

" We could drive you there." He suggested and I knew he was still working on the plan to get her to talk to us. Her jaw dropped and she stared at him in disbelief.

" Didn't you hear me when I said that I wanted you to stay away from me?" She asked and he shrugged at her.

" We did, we just don't care. Besides we can't just leave you with that ankle of yours now can we?" He said and she turned her head away.

" You could leave for L.A without telling me first..." I heard her mutter and froze. That was probably why she was mad at us. She didn't want us to leave! My mind began to process everything. " Fine. Just drive me there and then leave. I don't want anything to do with you guys anymore." She told Logan and he nodded.

" We can discuss that while we drive." Logan said and turned around and lead the way with Carlos next to him. James and I slowly followed with Jessica leaning on us for support. We helped her into the backseat and sat down on either side of her.

An awkward silence filled the car. Suddenly a phone rang and I looked at Jessica looking at the called id. She smiled to herself and answered.

" Hello." She said and both James and I where looking at her now. " I'm on my way to work right now but everything is fine I guess. Aren't you at work?" I heard a muffled voice on the line and she smiled even wider. " Aww... Poor Baby." She said and I felt a knot in my stomach. Who was she talking to? And why was she calling him baby? I felt a different bubbly feeling inside of me. It was kind of angrier then the other feeling- jealousy. We all looked at her weirdly and she stuck out her tounge at us. " Tell my mom I said hi okay? I need to go now. Hope you get better soon." She said and then froze for a split second before recovering. " I love you too Jer."

I felt like I was on fire. I don't know why but something was just ticking inside of me. She looked at us after she hung up just as Logan parked the car.

"What now?" She asked us annoyed and I took off my seatbelt and opened the door.

" Nothing." I muttered and slammed it shut after me and walked over to the other side to help James get her out of the car. As we helped her out I couldn't help but tighten my grip on her a little. I don't know why but I was so mad- correction- I _am _still mad and I just did it. James and I helped her to the elevator and then we were in silence once again.

I didn't know why but I found myself glaring at her for no reason at all. Logan was texting (probably Camille) and James was whisteling. Carlos then asked what I knew we all were wondering.

" So who's _Jer?" _He asked her and she looked at him.

" My boyfriend." Logan, who was next to me almost dropped his phone.

" You have a _boyfriend!" _I heard myself ask even if I didn't mean for the words to come out the way they did. She snapped her head in my direction.

" Yes. Didn't you think I could get one or what?" she asked and I knew I had to cover up quickly so I shook my head.

" No it's just that I'm surprized. You never told us you like anyone when we were back in Minnesota." I explained and she sighed deeply.

" Well that was then and now is now. Jeremy and I have been together for three months now and I'm happy so just let it go." She told me and I felt my jaw drop.

" Wait Jeremy as in _Jeremy Johnson?"_ I asked and she nodded. " You're dating a jock?" I asked and she nodded again.

" Woah. I thought you hated him." James said and She nodded. _Why does she nod all the time?_

" I did but then I changed my mind." She told us and I couldn't help but snort at her.

" And now you _love _him." I said simply and yet sarcastically. I could tell she was about to say something else when the elevator doors opened. I walked over to her and she held onto me and James in support. We saw Kelly standing there looking at us almost in horror.

" What happened?" She asked me and Jessica tilted her head motioning to us.

" _They _happened." She said and Kelly shook her head.

" Kendall didn't I tell you guys not to hurt anyone else?" She asked me and Jessica looked at her.

" Wait you guys know each other?" She asked us and we nodded.

" We kind of work for Gustavo." Logan said and Jessica rolled her eyes at us.

" Of course. Your boss is _my _boss." She said and we all nodded.

" Well Jessica, you need to sing right now because Gustavo is waiting for you in the recording studio.

" Woah Woah wait." Carlos said and looked her. " You sing?" He asked and she just nodded.  
" Yes. Now help me to the recording studio before I get fired." We didn't ask anymore questions, we just helped her to the booth where Kelly had put up a chair for her becasue of her ankle. We stood next to Gustavo and he looked at us.

" You know this girl?" He asked us and we nodded.

" She was our best friend back in Minnesota." James said and Gustavo nodded.  
" Does she sing good?" Gustavo asked as we watched Kelly say something to Jessica inside the booth.

" We have no idea." We said at the same time and watched Kelly come out of the booth.

" Play the music Gustavo." She said and stood up behind him as we watched Jessica sing.

" _La dee da, yeah_

__

You fled from medication  
'Cause it only causes pain  
You won't go to the doctor  
He keeps calling you insane  
You're lost even when  
You're going the right way  
You mean the world to me  
Even though you might be crazy

And you said we wouldn't make it  
But look how far we've come  
For so long, my heart was breaking  
But now we're standing strong  
The things you say  
Make me fall harder each day  
You're a trainwreck  
But I wouldn't love you if you changed  
No, oh, yeah

I shook your hand  
And you pulled it right away, yeah  
You asked me to dance  
Instead, I said, "No way"  
Inside I was dying to give it a try  
And you begged me so I stayed  
I knew you were different  
From the way I caved

_And you said we wouldn't make it  
But look how far we've come  
For so long, my heart was breaking  
But now we're standing strong  
The things you say  
You make me fall harder each day  
You're a trainwreck  
__But I wouldn't love you if you changed, yeah  
No, oh, yeah_

__

We were so different  
But opposites attract  
So my hope kept growing  
And I never looked back  
You're one of a kind  
No one can change this heart of mine, oh

And you said we wouldn't make it  
But look how far we've come  
For so long, my heart was breaking  
And now we're standing strong  
The things you say  
You make me fall harder each day  
You're a trainwreck  
But I wouldn't love you if you changed

_One more thing I thought I'd share  
With someone special  
I'm falling like I've never fell before  
It's funny you said we'd never make it  
And look how far we've come  
You're a trainwreck  
But with you, I'm in love"_

As she finished we were all standing there gaping at her in surprize and shock. She had an amazing voice. Stong yet soft and she looked like she belonged there, in the spotlight. She beamed as Kelly gave her a thumbs up and slowly stood up and limbed out to us. All I wanted to do was hug her. I don't know why but I just felt like I had missed her so much. Gustavo turned his chair to face her. He offered her his hand.

" Gustavo Rocque." He said and she shook his hand. " Welcome to Rocque Records." at those words she smiled widely and I bet if she could she would've jumped in excitement.

" Oh My Gosh Really?" She said excitedly and turned around and hugged me. I was surprized at first but it felt kind of nice so I hugged her back. She suddenly seemed to be realizing what she was doing and looked up at me. I looked down at her or maybe I was staring? I don't know, I just know that she quickly let go of me and mumbled " Sorry". I smiled at her slightly.

" It's okay Jess." She seemed to be thinking about something because she smiled to herself. That was when I knew that she was going to forgive us and that everything would be okay.

* * *

_**A/N: Okay so what did you think? Was it good? Did you like the little jealous Kendall? ;)**_

_**Tell me by reviewing! Urgh School is starting soon and I can't really say I'm loking forward to it... :/ Ah well what to do?**_

**_Peace Out!_**

**_xoxo_**

**_Spicy_**


	9. Chapter 8

_**A/N: Okay so this is a little shorter then the last two chapters but concidering that the last two chapters had lyrics in them I don't think it really counts. **_

_**So this is the chapter where Jessica makes up, or at least forgives the guys. I hope you like it even if it's a little short.**_

_**ENJOY! (And check out my other Big Time Rush stories too! If you want to.)**_

_**DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything that has to do with BTR. I just own my OC's and that's all.**_

* * *

_**(Jessica's Point of View)**_

Gustavo made me sing the song a fiew more times and then let me go home again. This time Carlos and Logan helped me to the car. Once we got in I put my hand on Logan's shoulder.

" Wait." I said and they all turned to look at me. I sighed. " I wanted to say, I'm sorry." I said and they looked at me. " I have been acting like a real spoiled brat this week. I shouldn't have and I'm sorry." I said and they nodded.

" We understand that your mad at us." Carlos said. " We are mad at us so why wouldn't you be? We forgot about our best friend." He said and I looked at him shocked. He was usually the goofball of the group and here he was now, all sreious.

" We're really sorry Jess." James said honestly and I leaned my head on his shoulder.

" Maybe we can use this chance to catch up and forgive each other." I said and they nodded.

" So we don't have to stay away from you anymore?" Carlos asked and we all looked at him.

" Seriously dude? Didn't you just hear what she said?" Kendall aksed and Carlos shrugged.

" Just checking to make sure." I chuckled.

" Well then the answer is no. Now let's get back to the Palm Woods. I'm supposed to meet new people not just my old friends." I said and Logan started the car.

When we arrived back at Palm Woods we went to the pool immediatly. I was still limbing but it was getting better.

" Sorry about almost breaking your ankle." Kendall said as I winced when I sat down by a table.

" Don't talk about it. I might get mad at you again." I said when suddenly some girl walked up to us.

" I can't believe you did this to me!" She yelled and I looked at her shocked. " You ruined my life! I was perfectly fine until you came along!" She yelled and slapped Kendall across the face. I put my hand to my mouth to stop myself from laughing.

" Camille!" Logan said and she stopped acting all weird and turned to him.

" Yes Logan?" She asked in a normal tone. He motioned to me.

" This is our friend from Minnesota, Jessica." The girl- Camille- looked at me and smiled.

" Hi I'm Camille." She said shaking my hand. I nodded and returned the smile.

" Pleasure to meet you." I said and she nodded and turned to Logan.

" Are we still up for later or are you spending time with Jessica to catch up?" She asked him and I looked at Kendall who mouthed "_dating". _Logan looked at me and I turned to answer for him.

" He's up for it, whatever _it_ was. I'll be fine with these three doofuses anyway." I said and Camille smiled amused.

" Okay then. It was nice meeting you. I have to go, I have an audition soon. Bye!" She said and stuttered off. I turned to Logan.

" Since when have you been dating her?" I asked him and he blushed slightly.

" Since forever." Carlos answered patting Logan's back.

" She seems nice." I said watching her leave.

" Oh she is." Logan said and then shut his mouth. " Did I just say that outloud?" He asked and I nodded laughing. They looked at me smiling.

" I've missed that laugh." Kendall mumbled but I seemed to be the only one who heard him. I could feel my cheeks getting warm as he looked me in the eyes. I felt my phone vibrate and had to look away.

" It's Jer." I said as I quickly checked the text.

"_Just realized that we said that we love each other 4 the 1st time ever. I rly meant it. I love U." _I smiled as I read it and qucikly replied.

" **Love U 2**" I put away the phone and looked at the guys.

" So you know what we've been up to. What have you been doing since we left?" James asked me casually and I shrugged.

" Nothing actually. I got a job at the local flower shop." I said and James raised an eyebrow.

" What about your looks? You have changed. No more glasses and no more baggy clothes." He stated and I smiled.

" Well I decided I needed a change so I just did it." I said and he let it go.  
" What about boys?" Carlos asked me and I shrugged.

" I've dated a couple but Jeremy is the longest relationship I've ever had with a guy. Well if you don't count our friendship." I said and they nodded. Logan checked his watch.

" Well I need to go prepare myself for my- uhm- _thing _with Camille." He said and I smacked him lightly.

" Just call it a date because we all know that it is." I said and he nodded smiling.

" Fine. Date." He said and waved at us as he left. James looked over at a couple of girls who were calling his name but motioning to Carlos. He looked at Carlos.

" Yo Garcia!" He said and motioned to the girls. " I think your girlfriend is calling for you." he said and I looked at Carlos.

" Carlos and a girlfriend?" I asked shocked and then looked at James and Kendall. " Do you two also have girlfriends?" I asked and James chuckled amused.

" I'm supposed to stay single. You know I wouldn't want to break all my fans' hearts." he said and I raised an eyebrow at him. " Sorry." He mumbled.

" James come with me. Stephanie has that friend with her." Carlos said and James gladly followed him leaving me and Kendall alone.

" So what about you? Do you have a girlfriend?" He looked at me and shook his head.

" I dated this girl but we kind of decided that we saw each other as just friends instead." He told me and I nodded. I suddenly began to feel the heat. I looked at the water in the pool.  
" Kendall could you help me up to my apartment?" I asked him and he nodded helping me up and letting me lean on him. I grabbed my bag and we slowly walked over to the elevator.

Once we where in the elevator he walked over to the other side and we just looked at each other. I felt something strane inside of me. Some kind of bubbly feeling. It didn't feel bad, it was just that i was surprized by it. I shook it off and smiled at Kendall.

" I really missed you." He told me. " _All of us _missed you." He corrected himself. I nodded.

" I missed you guys too." I said and he walked over to me. He was standing in front of me looking down at me. He leaned in and kissed my cheek.

" I'm sorry for not writing." He mumbled and wrapped his arms around me. " But _never _think that I forgot." He said and I snuggled into his chest. The elevator doors opened and we pulled away. We looked into each others eyes one last time and then he helped me out.

I opened my apartment door and he walked in behind me.

" Okay this is just weird." He said and I looked at him confused.

" What is weird?" I asked smiling. He sat down on my bed.

" We have the apartment next door and when we first moved here our apartment looked like crap." He told me and I laughed.

" I guess I'm just special." I joked and he nodded.

" You are." He said as our eyes locked again. I looked away ignoring what he had said.

" Uhm. Just wait here while I change into something a little more fitting for a warm day." I said and he nodded. I picked up my clothes and slowly, to not hurt my ankle, walked into the bathroom. I quickly changed into my black bikini and put on a navy blue short dress. I tied my hair into a pony tail and walked out of the room to see Kendall looking at my photos. He turned around with a picture in his hand.

"Jeremy seems to have changed." He told me and I nodded.

" He sure has." I said limbing over to him. I almost tripped on my bag an he caught me. I looked up at him. " Thanks." I mumbled.

" We don't want you to get hurt again now do we?" He winked and I smiled at him.

The day went on pretty good. I slowly began to feel at home again and got more and more comfortable with the guys. After Logan returned from his date with Camille we watched a movie together in their apartment. I almost fell asleep on their couch and James then helped me back to my apartment. He looked at me as we walked into it.

" We've missed hanging out with you." He said and I nodded.

" I've missed you guys too." I said and straightened up slightly and kissed his cheek gently. He beamed at me and walked out again.

" Good Night Jess." He said and I smiled.

" Good Night." He walked back into his apartment and I closed my door and slowly limbed to my bedroom. I smiled slightly before I fell asleep, thinking that making up with the boys was the best thing that ever happened to me.

* * *

_**A/N: Aww... They made up. And little Logie has a girlfriend and so does little Carlitos! :3 I really hope you like it though. Review and tell me and then I might post the next chapter, sooner then you think! =)**_

_**xoxo**_

_**Spicy**_


	10. Chapter 9

_**A/N: I don't have much time now. School has started and i needed to update now! I really hope you like this chapter because my computer is under repair so I won't be able to post as much!**_

_**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing! The song is Belive in me by Demi Lovato!**_

* * *

_**(Jessica's Point of View)**_

Weeks passed and I began to feel more and more at home in Palm Woods. I had recorded my first demo cd and had gotten accepted by Griffin's daughter Mercedes, just because she thought I looked pretty and would be any guys dream. Right now I had gotten a break from Gustavo and Kelly because I had worked so hard lately. I used to get up, go to work and come back late at night. That was my daily routine but of course I spent time with the guys too. And Logan's and Carlos' girlfriends had been spending much time with them lately so they got to know me aswell and we are pretty good friends now.

I put on my shades and laid down on the lounger by the pool. I felt some water dripping on my legs and looked up to see James and Carlos grinning at me.

" What?" I asked them and they looked at each other and nodded. The grabbed me in one swift movement and jumped into the pool with me as I shrieked. I got up from under the water and glared at them as they were laughing their asses off. " Haha. You're so funny." I said and attacked them with water. " Kendall! Logan! Help!" I shrieked as James picked me up on his shoulders. I grabbed his head to steady myself. Kendall dove into the pool and swam up to us laying on his back and floating.

" Nope. Can't do that." Kendall said and James laughed at me. I leaned lost balance and accidently fell forward. James lost his grip on me as I fell onto Kendall who got dunked in the process. I opened my eyes under the water and looked around and saw Kendall staring back at me. I smiled under water and shot myself up to the surface. I laughed as I got out of the pool.

" Okay so now would you please leave me alone so that I can get a tan? I'm to pale for California." I said and they nodded beginning their own water fight. Stephanie sat down next to me and Camille sat down on the other side.

" So?" They said at the same time. I looked at them.

" So what?" I asked and they smiled.

" Do you have a boyfriend?" Camille asked and for some reason I thought her eyes traveled to Kendall for a second.

" Yeah. Back in Minnesota. His name is Jeremy." I said and they nodded.

" Is he cute?" Stephanie asked me and I took out my phone and showed her the picture. " Wow." She breathed and I laughed.

" Hey! You have a boyfriend remember? His name is Carlos." I said and she nodded, still looking at the picture.

" Yeah but if I didn't I would probably-" She was interrupted by Carlos clearing his throat.

" You would what?" He asked crossing his arms. I looked at them amused as Stephanie stood up and kissed Carlos on the mouth. He blushed slightly and smiled at her. " Forget I ever said anything." he said and I laughed.

" Oh My Gosh Carlos! Is that all it takes to shut you up?" I asked laughing as the others got up from the pool.

" That usually does it." Kendall said and sat down by my legs.

" Okay I have to try that next time Jeremy and I fight." I said and Kendall looked at me.

" You two fight? I thought you _loved _each other." He questioned me but the way he said _loved_ surprised me. He said it like he was slightly disgusted by it.

" All couples have their fights Kendall." I told him and he just shrugged.

" Yeah but still. You should hear yourself on the phone with him. It's like freakishly sweet and that makes it almost creepy." he told me and I felt anger building inside me.

" Well at least I _have _someone to talk freakishly sweet with." I argued back and he stood up.

" Well you don't have to be so open about your _stupid _relationship and talk to him all the time when we are there!" He yelled and I saw people turning around to look at us. I stood up as well.

" What's your problem Kendall?" I yelled back.

" You! You are my problem!" He yelled and I crossed my arms. I felt the others looking at us.

" Oh really? And why is that? Still can't imagine me having a boyfriend who actually _loves _me?" I said and he pointed his index finger at me.

" You have been in California for almost two months now. How many times do you think he has cheated on you so far? He probably just calls you so that you wont suspect anything!" He yelled and I couldn't help what I did next. I slapped him hard across the face and everyone around us seemed to gasp. He turned his head back to me and looked me in the eyes.

" You went to far Kendall." I said and grabbed my things walking away leaving him and the others shocked.

_**(Kendall's Point of View)**_

I felt a stinging pain to my cheek and regretted everything I had said. I looked at her and saw hurt in her eyes.

" You went to far Kendall." she said and grabbed her things and then walked away. I didn't look after her, I just sat down where she had been sitting. Everyone was looking at me.

" What's your problem dude?" James asked me first. Stephanie and Camille stood up.

" We're going to check on Jess." They said and hurried away. I looked at James.

" I don't know." I said honestly. " I've just had enough of her and _Jeremy." _I said his name with disgust. " Don't you guys just feel sick when you hear her talk to him on the phone? That awful feeling like someone punched you in the gut when she tells him that she loves him?" They all looked at me until James finally spoke.

" Dude. You have a _crush _on her." He stated and I stared at him and then began to laugh.

" What are you talking about? I'm not crushing on Jess!" I said like it was ridiculus.

" Whatever man. The only thing now is that you need to go and apologize and you better do it good because she is seriously mad at you." Logan said and Carlos nodded in agreement.

" You really went to far." He told me and I sighed.

" I guess I did. I'll go talk to her." I said and got up walking to the apartment building.

I was walking to her apartment when I saw Camille and Stephanie walking back.  
" Is she there?" I asked and they shook their heads.

" She left to go to the recording studio. She wanted to try a song out." Camille said.

" But we think it was just a excuse to get away." Stephanie said crossing her arms at me.

" I know. I messed up. I'm going to apologize to her." I said and walked away leaving them alone.

I arrived at Rocque Records fifteen minutes later. I walked into the studio and noticed that no one was there. No one. I walked towards the recording studio and walked in slowly. I heard some music playing and peeked in. I saw Jess sitting on a chair with tears running down her cheeks. I listened to her as she began to sing.

" _I'm losing myself  
Trying to compete  
With everyone else  
Instead of just being me_

__

Don't know where to turn  
I've been stuck in this routine  
I need to change my ways  
Instead of always being weak

_I don't wanna be afraid  
I wanna wake up feeling beautiful today  
And know that I'm okay  
__'Cause everyone's perfect in unusual ways  
__You see, I just wanna believe in me_

_The mirror can lie  
It doesn't show you what's inside  
And it, it can tell you  
You're full of life  
(Full of life)  
It's amazing what you can hide  
(You can hide)  
Just by putting on a smile_

__

I don't wanna be afraid  
I wanna wake up feeling beautiful today  
And know that I'm okay  
'Cause everyone's perfect in unusual ways  
You see, I just wanna believe in me

I'm quickly finding out  
I'm not about to break down  
Not today

I guess I always knew  
That I had all the strength  
To make it through

_Not gonna be afraid  
I'm gonna wake up feeling beautiful today  
And know that I'm okay  
'Cause everyone's perfect in unusual ways  
You see, now  
Now I believe in me  
Now I believe in me __" _

She wiped her tears away and I opened the door slowly. She looked up at me and then turned her head away. I felt my heart drop as I walked over to her.

" I'm sorry." I said standing in front of her. She still didn't look at me. " I know I went to far. I don't know why I said those things. I'm sorry." I said again. She turned to me and stood up putting her head on my chest. I put my hands on her back holding her close. I felt like I never wanted to let go of her. She was still her old self, so fragile and insecure. I heard that from the song. She looked up at me.

" Jeremy would never cheat on me." She said and I nodded even if I didn't really believe it myself.

" I know. I just said that because I was hurt I guess." She looked me in the eyes.

" Why were you hurt?" She asked me and I realized my mistake. I watched her big brown eyes shine with tears and I realized something. I _was _hurt. I didn't want her to be with Jeremy. It had just hurt me to heard her be so happy with someone when I could never find someone to love. I put my hand to her cheek and caressed it softly.

" I was just afraid that I would never find the love you and him share I guess." I said. " I got jealous because you are so happy and I kind of also want to be happy." I admitted and she hugged me.

" Kendall. You'll find someone. Trust me. You will." She told me and I nodded, already knowing that I had found my someone. The only problem was that she had been taken from me right under my nose.

* * *

_**A/N: Awww... Please tell me what you thought! Reviews keep my spirit going! Oh and I needed Kendall to realize his misstake but I'm not sure I want Jessica to end up with him... You know I can just change everything in a heart beat. What do you think?**_

_**Tell me in a review!**_

_**xoxo**_

_**Spicy**_


	11. Chapter 10

_**A/N: HEy guys! I'm back with another chapter! :D I really hope you guys are liking this story. I know that you write pretty good reviews so I'm guessing you do. Well like I've said before school has now officially started and I have decided that my update days will be either on saturdays or on sundays, meaning the weekend. I hope that's okay with you guys and I wish you all well!**_

_**This chapter is the last chapter but from Jessica's point of view. I'm glad that some want Jessica and Kendall to get together but believe me when I say that there will be a minor bump in the road on that track. Did that make sence? If not I can clear it up by saying (SPOILER ALERT FOR FUTURE CHAPTERS!) Jeremy might be visiting and something might "happen". Ohhh! Now keep reading the story!**_

_**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing that has to do with Big Time Rush! I just own Jessica and any other OC's mentioned.**_

* * *

_**(Jessica's Point of View)**_

I stormed off to my apartment and laid down on the bed. I felt as if I was going to die. I had just slapped Kendall and I didn't really regret it at first, It was just the look on his face afterward that made my tummy turn. He was my best friend! But the thing's he said were not something you say to your best friend. It really hurt me deeply and I began to feel the insecurities building inside of me again. Jeremy would never cheat on me. He had saved me from depression. He had saved me from something really really _bad. _But the only people who knew about it where the people involved. I heard a knock to the door and at first I thought if might be Kendall.

" Weren't you finished being a jerk?" I yelled and opened it furiously only to see Camille and Stephanie staring at me. I gave them a apologetic look. " Sorry, I thought you where someone else." I said and they walked in.

" You mean Kendall." Stephanie stated and I nodded leaning against the wall.

" We where there you know. We saw and heard everything." Camille said and I felt tears building in my eyes again. " Look, what Kendall said was wrong and I know he may seem to be a jerk right now but trust me. You should have seen the regret in his eyes as soon as he said the words." Camille continued and I sighed.

" I know. I regret slapping him too but I just-" I couldn't continue anymore. They walked over to me and embraced me in a friendly hug.

" We know." Stephanie said and I quietly cried on her shoulder. We pulled away from the hug and I wiped my tears away. I knew what would make me feel better. _The song _always made me feel better.

" I'm going over to Rocque Records." I told them and they looked at me with questioning.

" Why? No one is there at this time." I nodded.

" Yeah I know. I just need to try a song out. It's nothing really. I'll be back later when I cool down." I said and tried to smile at them. I gave Camille my key.

" You can stay if you want to. Just lock it on your way out and give the key to James, Logan or Carlos. Bye." I said and quickly grabbed my bag and walked out not looking back.

I got a cab to the studio and slowly walked in. The only person there was a guy at a desk and he was typing away on his computer.

" I'm just here to try out a song." I said and he waved me off.

" Yeah yeah. Whatever just leave me alone I'm losing my game." He muttered looking completely lost. I wanted to yell at him for being so rude but knew that was just the effect from what had happened earlier. I walked into the recording studio and put the cd in with the music. I sat down on the chair and waited to press play. Tears began to run down my cheeks as the music began to play. I slowly began to sing, feeling all my worries flood away.

" _I'm losing myself  
Trying to compete  
With everyone else  
Instead of just being me_

__

Don't know where to turn  
I've been stuck in this routine  
I need to change my ways  
Instead of always being weak

_I don't wanna be afraid  
I wanna wake up feeling beautiful today  
And know that I'm okay  
'Cause everyone's perfect in unusual ways  
__You see, I just wanna believe in me_

__

The mirror can lie  
It doesn't show you what's inside  
And it, it can tell you  
You're full of life  
(Full of life)  
It's amazing what you can hide  
(You can hide)  
Just by putting on a smile

I don't wanna be afraid  
I wanna wake up feeling beautiful today  
And know that I'm okay  
'Cause everyone's perfect in unusual ways  
You see, I just wanna believe in me

I'm quickly finding out  
I'm not about to break down  
Not today

I guess I always knew  
That I had all the strength  
To make it through

_Not gonna be afraid  
I'm gonna wake up feeling beautiful today  
And know that I'm okay  
'Cause everyone's perfect in unusual ways  
You see, now  
Now I believe in me  
Now I believe in me " _

I wiped my tears away as the music stopped and heard the door open. At first I was afraid that Gustavo had caught me but then I saw the last person I ever wanted to see. I turned my head away from him and heard him walk closer.

" I'm sorry." He said standing right in front of me. I still didn't look at him. " I know I went to far. I don't know why I said those things. I'm sorry." He tried again and I just couldn't take it anymore. I stood up and nuzzled my head into his chest. How could he have been so mean to me? _He doesn't know what Jeremy saved you from, _my heart told me. If he did then maybe he would have been nicer about Jeremy. But I wasn't ready to tell him. Not yet anyway.

" Jeremy would never cheat on me." I told him and felt him nod.

" I know. I just said that because I was hurt I guess." He said and his words chocked me.

" Why were you hurt?" His eyes widened for a second as if he realized a mistake he had made. He put his soft hand to my cheek and caressed it softly.

" I was just afraid that I would never find the love you and him share I guess." He told me. " I got jealous because you are so happy and I kind of also want to be happy." I felt so bad for him. Of course he would find love. He was one of the best (not just good looking), kind and generous people I have ever known.

" Kendall. You'll find someone. Trust me. You will." I told him and he nodded still hugging me and holding me close. But he seemed to be deep in thoughts but I guessed I was just imagining.

* * *

_**A/N: I know this chapter was short but like I've said I'm kind of busy. I have a life outside of fanfiction as well (OMG I can't believe I just said that! Just kidding hehe...). But anyway if you want the chapters to keep coming then you have to review! **_

_**Oh and please check out my other story: The Girls Next Door. I need more reviewers on that one.**_

_**Thanks for reading!**_

_**xoxo**_

_**Spicy**_


	12. Chapter 11

_**A/N: Okay so here is chapter 11! YAY! I'm loving the reviews I'm getting. I love you guys. Now I know this chapter isn't the longest ever, but you know that school has started and I have like three other stories to write too. But right now I'm thinking about focusing on this one. I already know how I would like it to end and stuff like that but I still would like to know what you want. **_

_**So tell me! What do you want to see happen in this story? Reply in a review or PM me okay? I concider and read all reviews even if I might not reply to all of them. Please tell me and I'll love you forever. It can be a lot of help for me and also inspiration to other stories. :) **_

_**Oh and one more thing, thank you for reading this and please check out my other story The Girls Next Door :P**_

_**DISCLAIMER: I only own my OC's- meaning I don't own Big Time Rush! Just Jessica! :P**_

* * *

_**(Kendall's Point of View)**_

Another week passed and now Jess was back to work. She was actually a really good singer. I had never know that about her. I guess that was just another thing to put in the growing list of " _Reasons to why I lost the girl of my dreams to a jerk"_. Right now we were at the studio and recording a new song. Jess had decided to stay around even if she quit for the day to watch us.

" _Hello, tell me you know  
That you've figured me out  
Something gave it away  
And it would be such a beautiful moment  
To see the look on your face  
To know that I know that you know now_

__

And baby that's a case of my wishful thinking  
You know nothing  
'Cause you and I, we go carrying on for hours on end  
We get along much better than you and your boyfriend

_Well all I really want to do is love you  
A kind much closer than friends use  
But I still cant say it after all we've been through  
And all I really want from you is to feel me  
As the feeling inside keeps building  
And I will find a way to you if it kills me,  
If it kills me__ " _

Oh the irony. It's really killing me right now. That song pretty much described my situation. That was when I messed it up. Gustavo immediately stopped the song.

" What's going on in there Kendall?" He asked me and I cleared my throat.

" I need to take a break." I said. " I'm not feeling to well." I said and walked out of the studio. I walked into the men's bathroom and washed my face. _Get a grip man,_ I thought to myself. _**Not so easy when she's standing **__**right there**__** watching me sing.**__She isn't watching just you. She's watching all of you! __**I know but that song it just- **__Stop talking and turn around! Someone just walked in!_

I listened to myself and turned around. Jess stood there leaning against the wall. She locked the door and walked up to me.

" Jess, this is the men's bathroom." I said and she felt my forehead. He hand was soft against my skin and she was kind of cold. It felt kind of nice so I closed my eyes.

" Kendall, you're burning up." She told me concerned and I shook my head.

" I'm fine." I tired but she stopped me.

" No you're not. I'll go tell Gustavo that you can't sing today and then I'll drive you home and get you into bed." I smirked at her mistake and her eyes widened. " I meant-"  
" Jess don't worry about it. I know I'm hard to resist but you have a boyfriend-" My heart shattered at my own words."-so you have to try and control yourself around me." I said and she smacked me playfully. " Are you hitting on me now?" I joked and she smacked me again, this time harder.

" Kendall stop playing around." She said smiling. " Gosh you sound like James." She told me and I smirked at her.

" I know you like it." I said leaning down towards her but then realized what I was doing and pulled away. I know what you are thinking, why am I hitting on my best friend who isn't even single? Well it's complicated okay! It was just something about her that made me want to hold her close to me, hug her, kiss her senseless- _Woah where did that come from? __**Our heart.**_ I shook the thought out of my head when I noticed that Jessica was waving her hand in front of me.

" Kendall. Can you please let go of me now?" She asked shyly with a slight blush spreading across her cheeks. I looked at our position and noticed that I had pressed her against the sink and had my hands on her hips. I slowly nodded and let go of her. She looked at me shocked and then practically ran to the door opening it and ran away. Man I screwed up didn't I? She probably thought of me as some creep. I couldn't believe I had gotten carried away like that. I groaned and hit my head against the wall.

_**(Jessica's Point of View)**_

As he pushed me to the sink gently I began to feel weird. Not necessarily a _bad _weird but more of a confusing weird. Especially considering that his hands where on my hips and that he began to lean in. _Oh My God! Is he going to kiss me? __**Yes of course! Why would he be leaning in? **__Maybe he want's to blow away a bug or something. __**Are you serious? **_He seemed to realize what he was doing and pulled back but we remained in the same position. He seemed to be thinking about something and I decided that it would probably be best if I woke him up.

" Kendall. Can you please let go of me now?" I asked but couldn't help but blush when he looked at us. He nodded slowly and let go of me and I don't know why but I ran to the door and opened it running away. Maybe that was wrong to do but I had just realized something. _If _Kendall had kissed me, I would have kissed him back. I was just so confused right now. At first I thought it was just harmless flirting. You know, two best friends that just flirt a little here and there, but now it felt different. There was something deeper there. I would never cheat on Jeremy and yet I had felt like I _wanted _Kendall to kiss me. Maybe following to check on him was a bad idea after all.

When I walked into the studio they all looked at me confused.

" Well? Did you talk to him?" Gustavo asked in a loud voice. I nodded.

" I don't think he can keep practicing today. He has a fever and I should probably take him home." I said and Gustavo yelled as I watched him confused. I gave Kelly a look and she just shook her head for me not to ask. Gustavo turned to the other three.

" You three! Dance practice! The rest of the day! Starting NOW!" He yelled and they groaned. I walked up to Logan.

" I'll need the car keys." I said and he looked at me holding his keys close.

" Why?" He yelped.

" Because. I need to drive Kendall home and stay there to take care of him." I stated in a duh-voice. He hesitated but gave me the keys.

" Remember that it's Mrs Knight's car!" He called after me as I grabbed my bag and walked out.

" Yeah yeah whatever!" I yelled back and walked towards the elevator. Kendall met up with me halfway down the hall. " I got the keys." I said and he tried to grab them but I pulled them out of his reach. " I'm driving." I stated and he groaned. I smiled smugly almost forgetting what had happened in the bathroom. _Almost. _I needed to talk to him about that and considering that we would be alone at home, I had a chance to do so. But it wasn't something I was looking forward to...

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_**A/N: What do you want to happen next? :D Please tell me! I need to know!**_

**_The song was If it kills me, by Jason Mraz and I don't own that either, but It's a great inspirational song and I love it! :D Check it out!_**

**_Thank you for reading and please review! I'll update either on friday next week or Saturday. But I might review sooner depending on if I get many reviews or not. _**

**_Have a good day!_**

**_xoxo_**

**_Spicy_**


	13. Chapter 12

_**A/N: Okay I decided to update now cuz I might not have time tomorrow! Review and tell me what you thought and I'm sorry it's a little short okay?**_

_**DISCALIMER: I own nothing but my oc's!**_

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_**(Jessica's Point of View)**_

When we got back to their apartment Kendall laid down on the couch groaning while I walked over to the kitchen to make him some chicken soup.

" I can't believe I'm going to admit this, but my head hurts." He said as I took out the things I needed.

" When did it begin to hurt?" I asked him and he looked up at the ceiling.

" This morning, when I woke up." He told me and I looked at him.

" Why didn't you say so? I just thought you were being grumpy." I said and he chuckled.

" You make me sound like one of the seven dwarfs." He said and I laughed.

" Trust me, you are not a dwarf. You're probably one of the tallest people I know." I said and he laughed.

" Yeah..." He said trailing off. He turned to me and just watched me making the soup. " What are you doing?" He asked me confused.

" Making you soup. It always makes me feel better when I'm sick." I said and he raised an eyebrow at me.

" You can cook?" He asked and I nodded.

" Jeremy taught me." I said but regretted it biting my lip.

" Of course." I heard him mutter but I ignored it.

" I'll be done soon and then I'll be over there and give you some company." I said and smiled at him, trying to get him to forget about my previous comment. I think I succeeded because he smiled at me and turned around to lay on his side so that he could look at me.

As I put in the last things I needed in the soup I put it on the stove and walked over to him.

" You look really good when you cook." He said and then coughed. I smiled and touched his forehead again. He closed his eyes and put his hand over mine. I felt something twist in my stomach.

" Kendall?" I asked him and he just shook his head, still with closed eyes.

" You're cold and it feel's good when you have your hand there." He told me and I nodded and left the hand there. I slowly began to run my fingers through his hair and he sighed. I began to feel my hand cramp and stopped moving. He opened his eyes and looked at me.

" What's wrong?" He asked me, looking me in the eyes. There was something in his eyes that just made me want to kiss him. I was so confused, what was going on? I loved Jeremy! Not Kendall!

" I need to go get the soup." I lied and got up almost running to the kitchen as he watched me. I turned the stove off and grabbed the pan. Just as I grabbed it I remembered how hot it used to get and gasped when I burned myself. _**Bang!**_

I let go of it quickly into the sink which made the entire soup to be ruined. Kendall was quickly by my side when he had heard the bang and looked at me holding my hand.

" What happened?" He asked me and I began to panic.

" I'm so sorry. I ruined your soup! I just forgot how hot that pan could get and grabbed it and I burned myself and now... I..." I trailed of, tears threatening to fall. Kendall had grabbed my hand softly and was looking at it. As I suspected a red mark was forming on my palm. He turned on the cold water and put my hand under it. I bit my lip as the cold hit the burned spot. Kendall was still holding my hand and I don't know if it was the cold water or what, but I felt some weird spark. He turned off the water and grabbed a small towel and wiped the water away slowly, making sure not to miss a single drop. After that he pulled my hand up to his mouth and softly blew on the red mark. While doing so our eyes connected. I felt my mouth open slightly but nothing came out. I wanted him to stop because of Jeremy- and yet, I wanted him to continue because of me. Like I've mentioned before, I was confused. What was this feeling in my stomach! I wanted to get rid of it even if it felt good. I cleared my throat and Kendall raised an eyebrow at me.

" Feel better?" He asked and smiled a little. I had to bite my lip to stop myself from smiling. I pulled my hand away and examined it. The pain was almost gone but the red mark was still there. I looked up and smiled.

" Yeah. How did you know what to do?" I asked him curiously. His smile dropped.

" Let's just say that before I learned how to cook I had a hard time." He said and I couldn't help but laugh.

" Your such a baby!" I joked and he fake gasped.

" Says the girl that almost cried when she burned herself." He countered. I narrowed my eyes at him.

" That's low." I told him and he nodded smirking.

" I know." He said and I punched him lightly on the arm. " Hey! I'm sick remember!" He said and I nodded and hugged him.

" I know now let's go lay down a bit before you fall over." I said and he looked at me like I was crazy.

" Why would I fall over?" He asked me confused and I rolled my eyes and dragged him to the couch and pushed him down. He looked at me as I sat down next to him.

" Move over Kendall. We need to talk." I said and he did as I told him. I laid down next to him and he waited for me to continue.

" What do we need to talk about?" He asked me after I didn't say anything.

" You." I said as a matter of factly. " You need to stop _this._" I said and motioned to the two of us. He looked at me, still confused. " The never ending flirting." I stated and he made an 'o' face.

" You know that's just a joke, right?" He said but his voice wasn't very convincing.

" A joke that has to stop now." I said harshly and he turned slightly.

" But it's _our _thing." He said and I shook my head.

" No. It never has been Kendall." I said. " When we where back in Minnesota you never acted like this. You saw me as a friend and nothing more. So why do you act like this now?" I asked him and he sighed. " Is it because I changed?" I asked him and he stayed quiet. " Oh My God it is!" I said in outrage and sat up. " I can't believe this. You're only acting like this because I look good now?" He quickly shook his head.

" No! You looked good back in Minnesota too!" He said and I stood up and grabbed a pillow and threw it at him.

" No I didn't!" I said. " No one ever looked at me twice before I changed! And it has been both the best and the worst thing that has ever happened to me!" I said and sat down on the other side of the couch. Kendall slowly got up and sat down next to me.

" What do you mean?" He asked me quietly. I guess this is when I have to tell him. The entire truth. The only problem was that I didn't want him to know how Jeremy and I began to hang out. It was all actually a stupid mistake. A mistake that Jeremy had saved me from.

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_**A/N: So what did you think?**_

_**Answer these questions please: What part did you like/love the most and what do you want to happen next?**_

_**Tell me and your ideas might get put in the story! :D**_

_**Have a good day!**_

_**P.S. I might upload another chappie tomorrow if I find the time okay?**_

_**xoxo**_

_**Spicy**_


	14. Chapter 13

_**A/N: I'm concidering all the things you guys wrote in your reviews! :)**_

_**This chapter is the chappie when you find out what happened to Jessica back in Minnesota! I really hope you like it and I certainly hope you like the ending ;)**_

_**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing that has to do with Big Time Rush! I just own Jessica and Jeremy and any other oc's mentioned!**_

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_**(Kendall's Point of View)**_

She seemed to suddenly get very nervous, looking everywhere except at me. I grabbed her shoulder lightly and turned her to me.

" Tell me." I demanded, not roughly but softly. I gave her a look that told her she didn't have to be scared about anything. The look that told her that I cared and wanted to know. She sighed deeply.

" It happened when you guys moved to L.A." She started and we went to sit down again. " I tried to make contact with other people in school but no one really cared about me after you guys left. I had begun my change, gotten rid of the glasses and stuff like that and people began to see me. After a while I began to hang out with..." She trailed off thinking about it. Something bad must have happened since she had waited so long to tell us. I took her hand in mine and she looked at me with fear in her eyes.

" Continue. I'll listen." I told her and she nodded.

" I began to hand out with Scott Branson." She told me and my jaw nearly dropped. Scott Branson was like the jerk off all jerks. The only thing he did, besides getting into trouble with the police, was drink and party.

" Scott Branson? Why would you hang out with him?" I asked still slightly in shock. She cleared her throat.

" I was desperate. I needed new friends and no one except him would accept me." She said and then continued her story. " So Scott made me sneak out of my house late at night to go to parties with him and I was still changing. Not because of him! I wanted to change so that I could find new friends. Soon in class Jeremy began to stare at me. It felt kind of creepy at first because he had never talked to me or even looked at me before." Oh I could see where this was going. This is the story of how she and Jeremy "found" each other and fell in love.

" It was exactly a year after you guys left and your songs had begun to fill every club we went to. Scott was about to throw his yearly drunk'n'fun party, as he called it and he invited me in front of everyone in school. I said I would think about it because I knew what had happened there last year." I thought about it to. A girl had been abused the year before we left. It had taken months of therapy for her to get back to normal and even then she was acting paranoid. " When I later was by my locker Jeremy walked up to me. He told me that I shouldn't go to the party and that I should stop hanging out with Scott. I got really mad and of course I was stupid and walked over to Scott, accepting his invite. Later that night when I was at the party Scott began to act all weird around me. He tried to get me to drink even if I told him that I didn't want to. Soon he began to be really pushy and he grabbed me taking me outside." She didn't seem to be talking to me anymore. She was lost in her own world, remembering.

" He began to yell at me, calling me things. He then began t-to hit me. Luckily for me Jeremy was walking by and he ran up to Scott and punched him square in the face. Scott got up and took out a knife from his pocket. I had never been more scared in my life. Considering that Scott was drunk at the moment, he did the worst thing ever and stabbed Jeremy in the shoulder. I screamed out in fear and when people outside saw what was going on they called the police. Scott, stupidly, began to run away and I stayed with Jeremy when he was on the ground bleeding pretty badly." She told me. I began to instantly feel bad for calling Jeremy a cheater. He had saved her from Scott (who I by the way considered murdering by now for hurting my best friend). I felt my hands ball into fists. I should have been there to protect her. I should have been there, not Jeremy.

" What happened then?" I asked her anxious to hear the end of the story.

" Scott was caught. Jeremy was taken to the hospital and so was I. After they patched us up Jeremy and I didn't ever tell anyone about what really happened that night. Scott was put in juvenile and we never saw him again. Soon Jeremy and I began to hang out as friends, then best friends and soon enough we fell for each other." She said and sighed. " That's the story." She said and finally looked at me. I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her into a hug. She returned it immediately. Just holding her close made my stomach to backflips that would put Logan's to shame. We stayed like that, in each others arms for a fiew minutes, none of us wanting to break the contact.

" I'm sorry we weren't there to protect you." I said, my voice low and filled with regret.

" So am I Kendall." She said and put her head on my shoulder. I couldn't help but inhale deeply through my nose. She smelled of wild strawberries. " But luckily Jeremy was, otherwise I don't know what would've happened." My hands balled into fists. _I should have been there! If I was then maybe she and I could have been together by now! __**Did we just admit that we like Jessica? **__Oh my God I think we did!_

Jessica soon began to take care of me again. She told me to go and lay down in my room and I actually did what she told me to. I didn't want us to fight anymore. I wanted to just be with her. Spend time together and re-connect. I was laying in my bed when she walked in carrying a couple of blankets.

" In case you get cold tonight." She said and I nodded. She sat down on the floor close to my bed and just looked at me. I raised an eyebrow at her and she smiled slightly.

" What?" I asked her and she pointed to my head.

" You're wearing the beanie I bought for you on your birthday before you left." She stated and I nodded.

" It's my favorite." I told her and she bit her lip. I knew she wanted to ask me something. She always bit her lip when she got nervous or wanted to ask something. I think it was her way of stopping herself from talking. " What's on your mind Jess?" I asked her and she seemed to bite harder. _Stop biting your lip, I'm going mad here! _

" I just can't understand that you forgot." She said in a low voice so that I could barely hear her. I lifted myself up on my elbows and patted the place next to me in bed. She stood up and sat down next to me. I put my hand to her cheek.

" I _never _forgot."

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_**A/N: Aww... Another Jessica/Kendall moment. What did you think? To much? Not enough? Tell me by reviewing!**_

**_Answer this question and the person with the best answer get's a small sneak peak of the next chappie! : What would you call the Kendall/Jessica couple? (Meaning what couples name?). _**

**_The one with the best suggestion get's a sneak peak of the next chappie! ;) And I mean it!_**

**_Well for now, have a nice day!_**

**_xoxo_**

**_Spicy_**


	15. Chapter 14

_**A/N: Okay so I'm back with another chapter and it's a little shorter. **_

_**Congratulations to TheMonsterThatLivesUnderUrBed, who won the couple name "competition" with the suggestion "Kess". I liked it very much and I know some others also mentioned that one but since TheMonsterThatLivesUnderUrBed was the first one to suggest it I only thought it was fair that she (if ur a girl :O) got the sneak peak. But here is the chapter anyway so it doesn't really matter :)**_

_**So in this one there is a small "Kess" moment! :P Please enjoy and review after you've finished reading it! =)=)**_

_**DIsclaimer: I own nothing that has to do with BTR!**_

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_**(Jessica's Point of View)**_

I found myself looking at Kendall in confusion. Did he just tell me that he never forgot about me? If he didn't forget, then why did he stop calling and e-mailing me? Why did he break all contact with me? Why?

" What do you mean you never forgot?" I asked him and he caressed my cheek.

" I didn't." He said again looking into my eyes. Okay now I was officially confused.

" Explain Kendall. You didn't e-mail and you didn't call. Was it that hard to just call and say hi?" I asked him and he shook his head.

" It's not like I didn't want to hear your voice or something. It's just that we changed." He began to explain. " We became famous and we didn't have much free time after that. We had a tour and a concert. Then James' movie came up and after that it just got harder and harder for us to find time to call you or even sit by a computer." He said and I slowly began to realize that it wasn't their fault. I looked into his olive eyes and found myself getting lost again.

" You could have called on your way to work. My mom does that everyday." I said, pushing him to explain more.

" Well, for me personally it just got difficult." I looked at him confused. " Everytime I heard your voice, I wanted to be in Minnesota. Everytime I e-mailed and you wrote back I wanted to be there to experience what you where going through in school. I began to lose focus of my goal. I wanted to make you proud. You told us to get famous and we did. I did it mostly because of you." He said and I felt my eyes tearing up. How could I have been so stupid? And the way I had acted when I first got here, urgh I felt awful now. I felt a tear slide down my cheek. Kendall quickly sat up and wiped it away. " Don't cry! I'm sorry I didn't write!" he said, thinking that he was the reason I was crying. Well he was in a way right, but not the way he thought.

" I'm not crying because I'm sad!" I laughed. " I'm happy." My voice cracked and he hugged me close to him. It felt nice and I don't know why but I got a feeling that I never wanted him to let go of me. I nuzzled my head in the crook of his neck and he kissed the top of my head. We stayed like that for a while until I pulled away. " Weren't you sick?" I asked him and he chuckled.

" I guess you made me feel better." He said smiling at me and I just couldn't help but crack a smile. He suddenly stood up and grabbed both of my hands. " Why don't we go do something fun? We can go to the city! You haven't really seen town yet right?" He asked me excitedly.

" No, not properly." I said and he dragged me up from the bed.

" Well go get ready because you're going on a ride with the Kendall-fun-train!" He said and I raised an eyebrow at him.

" Really Kendall, Really? The Kendall-fun-Train?" He nodded and I just laughed walking out of their apartment and to mine.

I quickly put on my black t-shirt and faded jeans. I looked casual, but still good. I smiled to myself and put my hair up in a high ponytail and then put on my shades. I exited my apartment to see that Kendall was already waiting outside for me.

" Come on. Let's go before the others get home." He said grabbing my hand and dragging me towards the elevator.

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_**A/N: I just need to ask one more thing: Did you like this Kess moment or not? You know, when Kendall explained why he stopped calling and so on? If you did, please review! There might be some drama coming up in some later chapters ;)**_

**_Check out my other stories too! And please review on this one!_**

**_xoxo_**

**_Spicy_**


	16. Chapter 15

**_A/N: Long time since I updated this story last! But hey this is a lot longer then the last chapter and it's much more Kess filled! I really hope you like it! I have a lot of stuff for school now and I might not be able to update so soon but for now please enjoy this chapter!_**

**_My other stories will be updated this weekend, I just couldn't wait any more to updaye this one. :D_**

**_DISCLAIMER: I own nothing that has to do with Big Time Rush! I just own Jessica and any other OC!_**

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_**(Kendall's Point of View)**_

Even if Jessica was wearing casual clothes, she looked amazing. It was really strange you know. How suddenly all this feelings are coming out. Wait what did I just say? Feelings? No! Psh! I don't have feelings for Jessica... Right?

Well anyway, I was driving towards Hollywood right now. I had a feeling she would want to walk down the walk of fame. Who knows, one day she might be there. She was looking outside when I glanced at her from the side. I felt like I needed to break the silence.

" So, are you and Jeremy serious or what?" Why did I have to ask that? That sounds either super weird or super desperate! She turned around and looked at me with her big brown eyes.

" Uhm, yeah I guess. Define serious." She said and I swallowed hard.

" I mean like, do you see yourself having a future with him and stuff like that?" Her eyes widened.

" Why are you asking me this?" She said in a low voice. Why was I asking her? Was it because deep down I was hoping that she would break up with Jeremy and be with me? I doubt she would do that. After all, he was the one who saved her, not me.

" Just curious I guess." I said as if it didn't really matter, but oh did it ever.

" Oh." She said blankly. " I don't really know if I should tell-"

" Come on Jessica. It's not like I'll tell anyone. It'll be between the two of us. _Our _little secret." _Just stop talking already! You're just making it worse! _

She bit her lip. " Okay I guess." She said. " I think I can see myself with someone like him even in the future. I love him." Something just cracked inside of me.

" Oh." Now it was my turn to shut up.

" So what about you Kendall? What do you see in your future?" She asked me and I began to think about it. _You. Me. Together. Maybe get married._ _No! What am I thinking? Stop it get the ideas out of your head!_

" I don't know. You tell me." I told her. Yeah that would make it a lot easier right. She smiled that little charming smile of hers.

" Well. I can see us in a fiew years. We are neighbors, or at least living close to each other. We can have like our own street or something." I chuckled as she let out a laugh. " You are probably married by then-"

" Hey why would I get married so young?" I asked her and she just chuckled.

" Because! You asked me what I thought and I have to make it sound interesting!" I laughed with her.

" Okay, go on then." She nodded.

" Well you have like six or seven kids because you couldn't keep your hands off of your wife and they call me cool Aunt Jess." She grinned at me. _It would be better if they called you mom, _I thought and then realized what I had just thought. My eyes widened a little but I kept my face straight then. I offered a small laugh and she continued. " Jeremy and I will be living next doors and our kids would play together all the time. And when James' pretty babies come by, Logan's little angels and Carlos' daredevils then we would have the time of our lives. It would be great and all our kids would end up getting married and we would all be a real family." She finished and I laughed.

" What about our careers?" I asked and she smiled.

" Well they are great. We have our own street remember?" I nodded and she looked around. " Uhm Kendall?"

" Yeah?" I asked.

" Where exactly are we going?" She asked and I smiled.

" Hollywood."

" Wow, this is actually pretty amazing." Jessica mumbled when we parked the car. We where walking down the walk of fame right now. " Could you take a picture of me here?" She asked smiling at me and I felt my heart flutter.

" Yeah." I said and she handed me her phone. She knelt down to the ground so that I would get the picture of the star as well. For a second I found myself getting lost in her big brown eyes but finally managed to get a hold of myself. _God I'm sappy. _I took the picture and handed her the phone again. She smiled seeing the picture. " It looks great." She said and looked up at me.

" Well _you _look good." I said and pointed at her. She grinned and suddenly surprised me by hugging me.

" I'm so glad your my best friend." She sighed against my chest and I looked out in the open air.

" Yeah... Best friend..." I mumbled and then we walked on towards some clothe stores.

" Kendall stop!" Jessica suddenly exclaimed outside a store. " Look!" She pointed to the window and I squinted to look inside.

" It's a hat?" I asked not really getting why she had been so excited.

" That isn't any hat." She said walking closer. " It's _the _hat! You know the one you wanted to buy in Minnesota but it was to expensive and when you then finally put the money together they where sold out. Remember?" My eyes widened and I ran up pressing my face to the window. Yes it was _the one. _It was THE hat. I would recognize it's gray fabric anywhere.

" Let's go inside and check it out." I said grabbing her hand and dragging her inside, ignoring the sparks. Both she and I stopped when we entered it was as if we had entered hat & scarf heaven. There where like a thousand different kind of hats and scarfs.

" I'm going over there!" Jessica exclaimed and ran to the beige scarf collection. I turned around and walked towards the hat again. I checked the price tag. _Not as expensive as I remember it, _I thought beginning to wonder if I should get it or not.

_**(Jessica's Point of View)**_

Even if I had gone over to the scarf collection, I couldn't help but look at Kendall. He was kind of different. I don't know what it was but it made me feel things... I don't really know what it is. It's just that I'm together with Jeremy and I love Jeremy, but I also love Kendall. God I feel like that Bella girl in Twilight. It's like I love Jeremy like a boyfriend and Kendall like a brother, but then that changes and I suddenly feel very attracted to him. That is why I had to get away. Because of what I felt when he grabbed my hand. It felt like everything suddenly was alright in the world, like it was supposed to be that way and then, I remembered Jeremy.

" God I'm stupid..." I mumbled to myself.

" What did you say Jess?" I turned around and saw Kendall holding the hat in his hand. I smiled at him slightly.

" Nothing. Just talking to myself. Can't decide which scarf I like the most." I said nervously and he raised an eyebrow at me. I picked up two random scarfs. " See?" I held them both up to show him and he pointed to the olive green one.

" That one." I looked at it.

" Really?" I asked checking it. It actually looked okay. Well not okay, it looked amazing. I looked at the other one. It was light blue, like Jeremy's eyes. The other one reminded me of Kendall's slightly. _Oh no. _I bit my lip. Of course, I _had _to pick two scarfs that reminded me of both of the guys that I love- No! Like! I just _like _Kendall! I _love _Jeremy!

" Yeah. It look's great on you." He complimented and I looked in a mirror. It did look pretty good. I turned to him.

" What about the other one? Why don't you like it?" I asked and he scratched his chin.

" Well, I just think the other one fits you better." He admitted. " The blue one is also nice but it just doesn't belong with you. Do you get what I mean?" He asked and furrowed my eyebrows.

" Yeah I think I do." He nodded, relief spreading across his face. " But what if you're wrong? What if I fit better with the blue one?" I realized how I was saying it and stopped. Was it just about the scarfs now or was it about my relationship with Kendall? I'm just so confused right now. When I'm with Kendall, I forget about Jeremy and when Jeremy suddenly calls or texts me, I get a wake up call that reminds me that he is my boyfriend and not Kendall.

" Jess? Jessica?" Kendall was waving his hand in front of my face as I jumped.

" What what?" I asked confused.

" Are you getting the scarf or not? You spaced out." He told me and I looked at the prize tag.

" Uhm. No I can't afford it right now. It's to expensive for me." I said putting the blue one back but holding onto the green one.

" So you liked the green one better?" Kendall asked and I looked at it, then back at him. I slowly found myself nodding but I put the green scarf back as well. I had basically just admitted to myself that if I had to make the choice, I would pick Kendall before Jeremy- which was wrong. Yes Kendall and I where best friends, but Jeremy and I still love each other. It's not as if I can just call him and tell him it's over. " Then I'll get it for you." Kendall said, waking me up from my thought's as he grabbed the green scarf.

" No! Just buy your hat and we'll leave. It's not a good scarf anyway..." You could hear in my voice that I was lying. _Why was I cursed not to be able to lie to my friends? Maybe because you aren't supposed to lie to them- Nah._

" Okay if you want to be stubborn then be stubborn." He said shrugging and put the scarf down as I looked at it longingly.

" I'll be outside." I said not being able to take my eyes off the scarf. He nodded.

" Alright. I'll just pay for this and I'll be out." I nodded and glumly walked out of the store.

It took a little longer for him then I had expected but then we continued to walk the streets and checking out the other stores. We where now on out way home and I was still a little upset over that scarf. Why? Why! That was the question circulating in my head. My heart was saying green but my brain kept telling me to be fair and pick blue. Stupid. We didn't talk on the whole drive home. I kept yawning to let Kendall think that I was just tired, but I knew I wouldn't be able to get a seconds sleep tonight.

We stepped out of the elevator and took the elevator to the second floor. Kendall followed me to my apartment.

" I have a surprise for you." He told me as I jumped down on my bed.

" Really?" I asked suddenly forgetting all my issues.

" Yeah." He took out his bag where his hat was and pulled it out first. I took it from his hands and examined it.

" You have really good taste you know." I said and put it on his head as he chuckled.

" I hoped you would say something like that." He then pulled out a separate bag from inside the first one and handed it to me. " Here. Open it." He said and I looked up at him.

" What is this Kendall?" I asked him and he just bit his lip.

" I wanted to say I'm sorry..." he trailed off.

" For what?" I asked him slowly and he looked down.

" I haven't been my usual self during the time you have been here. I was a complete jerk to you and I know you forgave me but I never forgave myself for hurting you." I looked at him with big eyes.

" What are you saying Kendall?" He sighed looking me straight in the eyes.

" I'm saying that I think I made the wrong decision once." I felt my stomach flip. Was he saying what I thought he was saying? " Just open it." He said and I did. The soft silk material tingled against my fingertips as I pulled out the green scarf I had been looking at earlier today. The color was the exact same as Kendall's eyes who had once again locked with mine. He took it from my hands slowly, his hands brushing against mine, sending jolts through my body, and put it around my neck and stepped closer to me. Our bodies where close now. I could feel his breath on my lips and the silence was speaking for us. He was looking at my lips and I somehow found myself looking at his. He began to lean in as I just waited.

" What are you doing?" I whispered and he stopped for a half second but continued.

" Something I should have done on the airport, three years ago..." Just as his lips barely brushed against mine the doorbell rang. We both froze. I snapped out of the trance first, pulling away. I knew that if it had been only a second longer I would have let him kiss me and I would have kissed him back for sure. He sighed deeply and closed his eyes as if he regretted what he had done. I didn't know which it was though. The almost kissing me part or _not _kissing me at all. I felt in my stomach that I too regretted something, what it was I didn't know. I stepped around him.

" I just need to get that." I mumbled loud enough to hear and he just nodded. I found myself smiling slightly as I opened the door but it quickly disappeared as the person in front of me chuckled.

" Surprise!" I looked shocked towards the bedroom where Kendall was and then back at the person.

" What are you doing here?"

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**_A/N: Okay sorry sorry sorry for the cliffy! But tell me, who do you think it is? It might be obvious, hehe... Anyway I have gotten really inspired to write a new story! I think it will be called A.S.A.P. but I'm still not sure. It's another Oc story and I think I want to put her with Kendall but I'm just not sure yet... It's a little different then my other stories, it kind of starts a little sad with hurt and stuff like that but then it changes and- ah well if you want to hear about it just write it in a review and I'll try to post a plot on the next chapter okay?_**

**_Now please make my day and go and update! I need at least 5 reviews to make me feel better :) (maybe I forgot to mention that I'm sick again. Stupid cold... Atchoo! ewww! what was that?) Haha just kidding! not about the cold, I really am sick, but still please review! :)_**

**_And don't forget to tell me if you want more info on the new story!_**

**_Have a great day!_**

**_xoxo_**

**_Spicy_**


	17. Chapter 16

READ! VERY VERY VERY IMPORTANT!

**_A/N: Yay! It's time for the long awaited update! Yay! :D_**

**_So this is a part of my Big Time Update Bash! I'm also updating all my other stories (which are three others but one of them is for another show...)!_**

**_So, in the last chapter I mentioned a NEW story called A.S.A.P. I think it's actually turning out pretty okay, if you want to know more about it then you can check my profile. I've written down what it's about there. So if you do check it out, tell me later what you thought of it. =) Thanks._**

**_On with this new chappie now. About this story, I have everything planned out in my head, I just have a hard time writing it down. It's a lot of stuff in school and things like that but I figured, if I write a little on every story every day, then I'll be able to finish everything in time. =) A lot of you figured out who will be at the door and trust me, it's not a huge shocker..._**

**_Please Enjoy, oh and one more thing! Tomorrow is my Birthday (24 of October). I'm turning 16 and I really hope you guys will review and make me happy for it because I wont be checking the reviews until tomorrow! ;)_**

**_Now, Enjoy!_**

**_Disclaimer: I own nothing, I just own Jessica and Jeremy! _**

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_**(Jessica's Point of View)**_

" What are you doing here?" The question flew out of me before I could stop myself.

" Aren't you happy I'm here Jess?" I quickly made a small smile and ran up to hug him.

" Of course I am Jer!" I laughed as he spun me around. " Gosh I'm just surprised! Why didn't you tell me you where coming you dork!" Jeremy chuckled and let me down. Someone cleared his throat behind me and I turned around to see Kendall looking awkwardly at us. Jeremy's smile dropped.

" Who is this Jessica?" He asked sternly and I gaped a little.

" Oh it's my friend. Kendall." I called Kendall over who just took one step closer. " You remember Kendall right?" Jeremy's face was still a little dark.

" Yeah." He said simply. Kendall nodded curtly and offered his hand.

" Kendall." He introduced himself. " You must be Jeremy. Jess has told me so much about you." This was a good sign. He was being civil and didn't say anything about the _almost kiss. _Jeremy took his hand.

" Yeah. You're the guy who left Jessica behind in Minnesota." Kendall visibly stiffened but Jeremy chuckled. " I'm just kidding man. If you hadn't done that, then Jessica and I would maybe never had gotten together." Kendall chuckled but I could tell it was fake.

" Yeah. So funny..." Kendall trailed of and silence filled the room. I turned to Jeremy.

" You can get settled if you want. I just need to talk to Kendall for a moment." I said and he nodded.

" Nice meeting you." He said passing Kendall who just nodded and mumbled something.

_**(Kendall's Point of View)**_

" Nice meeting you." Jeremy said and passed me. I nodded at him.

" You too Jackass..." I mumbled and closed the door behind him. Jessica and I where left in the hallway, alone. She was looking anywhere but my eyes.

" Listen Kendall," She began uncertainly. " I don't know what just happened. I had no idea Jeremy would come and visit me or anything like that, otherwise-"

"-what just happened would have never happened." I finished the sentence for her and she nodded. I just shook my head. " Nothing happened Jessica." The words that came out of my mouth didn't sound like mine. Something _had _happened. We almost kissed.

" But it _almost _did." She still wasn't looking at me. " I'm so sorry Kendall. I can't do this. You're my best friend and Jeremy is my boyfriend."

" You didn't do anything." I said and she looked down at her feet.

" But I wanted to..." She mumbled loud enough for me to hear. I lifted her head up and our eyes met. As much as I wanted to kiss her right then and there, I didn't.

" Jessica-" I started but sighed. I didn't know what to say. "-listen-" I tried again but she stopped me.

" No Kendall. You listen. I don't want something to happen here. We just need to pretend that nothing has happened and that way nothing ever will. We just have to ignore what we feel for each other and that is what is best for all of us." She backed away as I processed what she had said. _What we feel for each other..._

" Okay." I simply said and she looked shocked.

" Really?" she asked, as if to say: Was it that easy? I nodded.

" Yeah. Good Night Jess." I said walking away and into my apartment not looking back at her when she said good night.

As I walked into the apartment James, Carlos and Logan jumped up from the couch.

" Where have you been?"

" Do you know what time is it?"

" When did you get that hat?"

" Where is Jessica?" The questions kept coming and I didn't know exactly from what direction. I walked past them and threw myself on the couch. They shut their mouths and walked over to me. They looked at me with raised eyebrows.

" What's going on with you?" They asked at the same time. I turned around and put my face in the pillow.

" I almost kissed Jessica." I said into it, but that made it sound more like " Hai halmoscht hissed Hessica".

" What?" They said again and I turned to face them.

" I almost kissed Jessica!" I said loud enough for them to hear and their jaws hit the floor. Not literally.

" YOU WHAT!" They yelled loudly and I cringed.

" You heard me." I said and they nodded. Logan seemed to wake up from the daze first.

" You do know that she has a boyfriend right?" He asked me and I nodded. " And yet you almost kissed her?" I nodded again and groaned.

" It's just that I- I don't know how to explain it but, I bought her a scarf and she looked so amazing, and I just kind of, urgh!" I exclaimed throwing my hands in the air. " I'm so stupid!"

" Okay, tell us what happened." Logan said sitting down. James and Carlos where still kind of gaping at me but Logan slapped the back of their heads and they woke up. I told them everything about the way I had helped her when she burned herself and what had happened back in Minnesota and how we had gone off to Hollywood and about the almost kiss. In the end of my story they all looked sick.

" Wow... I feel so bad for being selfish..." James said grabbing his stomach. " There is this weird feeling in my stomach. It's almost like hunger but it feels really bad." He tried to explain.

" That's guilt." Logan stated grabbing his own stomach. " And I feel it too."

" Man I hate Scott Branson!" Carlos exclaimed.

" Me too." We all said at once.

" And after that almost kiss, Jeremy turns up and they are all happy again and Jessica asks me to try and forget everything that had happened between us." The three of them turned their heads and leaned in closer.

" Jeremy is here?" James asked and I nodded.

" Yeah and I can't be mad at him because I was the one who tried to kiss his girlfriend who he saved from being abused and I left alone back in Minnesota." Carlos had a small smile playing on his lips.

" So you liked Jess back then too?" He asked, clearly amused, grinning from ear to ear. I began to think about it. I didn't not _not _like her, that's for sure.

_**(Jessica's Point of View)**_

When Kendall left, I felt as if I needed to cry. I felt so bad about what had happened. _Nothing happened..._ His voice echoed in my ears. Why had I been so stupid? Why had I begun to fall for my best friend? Why did I almost cheat on my boyfriend because of Kendall? _You love him, _a voice inside my head said. I felt a tear run down my cheek. I wiped it away with my hand and then walked into the apartment where Jeremy was waiting for me. He grinned at me and embraced me into a big hug.

" God, I've missed you so much!" He said kissing the top of my head. I forced a laugh.

" I missed you too." I said. _No, you completely forgot about him. __**Shut up. **__Fine, whatever... _" Why didn't you call and tell me that you where coming to visit?" Jeremy grinned at me.

" I'm not just here to visit." I gaped at him.

" What do you mean?" He grinned even wider.

" I got a job here in town and I'll be moving here this summer." I couldn't help but squeal in happiness and jump up and down, even though it was only with half of my heart.

" That's great!" I said and hugged him. He pouted at me.

" Don't I get a kiss?" I smiled slightly.

" Well of course." I pecked his lips, but something felt wrong.

" That's better." He said and embraced me. I stayed quiet. " Is something wrong Jess? You seem awfully quiet." Jeremy pulled away and I walked over to the couch and sat down.

" I just, can't believe..." I said, not knowing what else to say or do. Jeremy smiled at me, thinking I was happy- I was happy but at the same time sad. Was that even possible?

" Well you better believe it, because I'm here to stay!" Jeremy pressed his lips against mine and I didn't hesitate kissing him back. While we stayed there on the couch, in each others arms, Jeremy had fallen asleep. Probably because of the long flight. As I was drawing circles on his palm I couldn't help but think about the boy in the apartment next to mine, and I kept wondering what he was doing and if I had made the right decision. When I later on fell asleep, I did not dream of ocean blue eyes, I dreamt of olive green ones...

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**_A/N: Okay so what did you think? Reviews? This story is really close to passing 100 reviews! I'm just saying. Don't forget my birthday! :D_**

**_xoxo_**

**_Spicy_**


	18. Chapter 17

**_A/N: Hi you guys! =D Look I know it has been a long time since I last updated this story and I figured that since I only had time to update one, I would update this one. =) I really hope this makes you happy and I really hope you'll like this chapter enough to review it. You see I'm on the edge of 100 reviews on this story! Yay! :D I have 99 reviews right now and it's amazing! This will most likely be my second story to pass 100 reviews! =D Thank you so much for all the support you guys and just so you know, this story isn't finished yet but I'll try to write more chapters as soon as I can!_**

**_This chapter has a little twist in the end and I hope you like it! ;)_**

**_Disclaimer: I own nothing that has to do with Big Time Rush! I just own Jessica and Jeremy!_**

**_Now Enjoy!_**

**_P.S. There is some Logan Point of View in this one too! Hope you like it! =D_**

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_**(Jessica's Point of View)**_

I felt a pair of lips meet mine as the morning sun warmed my face. I smiled into the kiss and slowly opened my eyes.

"Good morning." Jeremy said and smiled down at me. I didn't speak, I just smiled at him. "Did you sleep well?" I nodded.

" Yeah. I guess I did." He smiled and once again kissed me.

" Good." I sat up in the bed and walked over to my closet and took out an all red sundress. I put my hair up in a neat ponytail. Jeremy watched me intently. I turned and offered him a small smile, not being able to get _Him _out of my head. " Hey, I was thinking," Jeremy said as I put on my shoes. I took out a brush and sat down on a chair and began to comb through it. " maybe we could spend some time with Kendall and the guys. I mean since you have forgiven them and so on. I would like to get to know them better." I almost dropped my hairbrush when he said Kendall's name but quickly recovered.

" Uhm I don't know if they will have time today because they have a lot of rehearsals." Jeremy nodded.

" It's okay I guess. I understand." I smiled at him. Of course he understood. That was just how great he was. _Kendall would've understood too_, my mind told me and I knew it probably was true but lied to myself and said I was better off with Jeremy.

" Yeah and I have rehearsals today too." I said and he got up and got dressed as well.

" Great, can I come?" I bit my lip and put down the brush.

" I'll call Gustavo and- no on second thought I'll call Kelly and ask her. She'll probably say yes." He smiled at me and walked up to me. He put his arms around my waist and embraced me.

" I love you." He said and his words warmed my heart. The only problem was that I couldn't stop thinking about the boy next door, who was probably awake by now.

_**(Kendall's Point of View)**_

I poked at my oatmeal with my spoon. I knew the guys where trying to act as if everything was okay and they where doing it pretty well so far. They didn't say Jessica's name even once but I knew that they where thinking it. How could I have been so stupid? She loved Jeremy and yet I almost kissed her.

" Today we are going to rehearse that new song right?" Carlos asked trying to start a conversation.

" Yeah." Logan said and took a sip of his coffee.

" What was it called again?" James asked, even if we all knew that he knew the name of it.

" 'til I forget about you." I said and he nodded.

" That's right." James said and took a bite of his sandwich. I looked down at my plate and grabbed it standing up. I walked to the garbage can and threw it all away. They looked at me confused.

" What are you doing?" Logan asked as I put the plate in the dishwasher.

" Not hungry." Carlos nodded.

" Yeah, did you guys know that when you are in love with someone you usually don't eat as much as you used to? You lose a lot of weight too." He stated and I snapped my head in his direction.

" What are you saying?" I snapped harshly and Carlos shrugged.

" I'm just stating a fact and that's that you love _Her_." I didn't say anything to protest. He was right. I did love her. I just could never be with her. She had a boyfriend. There was a knock on the door and I already knew who it would be. Logan shot me a apologetic glance before walking to the door and opening it. As I suspected there stood Jessica wearing a red sundress and looking all beautiful with her hair naturally falling down on her shoulders.

" Good morning everyone." She said, but refused to meet my eyes. " I want you to meet Jeremy, my boyfriend." She said and Jeremy walked in. He flashed his white teeth at us.

" Hi. I'm Jeremy." He said and James and Carlos also walked over to shake his hand. " Jessica has told me so much about you guys." I could see that my friends where torn between what to say and what to do. They didn't know if they should just be polite or tell the guy off, but with the look Jessica gave them they quickly made up their mind.

" I'm James." James said and shook his hand.

" Carlos."

" Logan." Jeremy nodded at each and everyone of them.

" And I've already met Kendall." He said and I faked a smile.

" Yeah. Hi again Jeremy." I said through gritted teeth. Jessica still didn't look at me.

" So can we come in before we head to the studio?" She asked and we all nodded. We sat down on the couch, or rather they sat down while I said I had to get dressed and walked into mine and James' room. I sat down at my desk and stared out the window. I sat there for a while and just thought about her. I still want to kiss her. I still want to love her and hold her and show her what she means to me. I want her to know what she means to me. I want the world to see what she means to me. She's my everything and I really do love her.

When I was so caught up in my own thoughts I didn't hear the door open. I jumped when someone put his or her hand on my shoulder.

" Kendall?" My heart sunk. I turned around.

" Jess."

" Are you okay?" She asked me, her voice kind of low. I ran a hand through my hair.

" Yeah, just a little tired." She pursed her lips and nodded curtly.

" I just wanted to say that Jeremy will drive me to the studio and that I'll meet you guys there." I nodded.

" He's coming with you to the studio?" She nodded back at me and then looked away. I could tell she wanted to say something but was holding it back. " I'll-" I stopped. " We'll see you there." I said changing my mind. I couldn't meet her eyes and she just sighed and walked out of the room. I looked after her, one thing going through my mind: I should have told her.

_**(Logan's Point of View)**_

Jessica closed the door after her when she walked out of Kendall's room. She looked like she was on the edge of breaking down but her expression changed when her eyes met with mine.

" Are you ready Jer?" She asked, her voice strong but I could still hear something was wrong. He looked up at her and I noticed something in his eyes.

" Yeah." He said and stood up. He turned to us. " It was great getting to know you guys." He shook our hands again and I followed them to the door.

" We'll meet you at the studio." I said and Jessica waved at me and then took Jeremy's hand and walked away. I closed the door and turned to James and Carlos.

" Did you see that?" I asked them and they nodded.

" Jeremy's smitten with her." James stated and I nodded.

" He loves her." We turned our heads and saw Kendall standing by his door. He walked out to us and we all looked at each other. " He loves her very much and I know you three can see it aswell as I can." He said again and I nodded.

" I'm sorry man." I said and he shrugged.

" It's okay. As long as she is happy I'm happy." He lied.

" Dude," James said. " you couldn't sleep all night. You've got bags under your eyes and when you finally fell asleep you were mumbling her name in your sleep." Kendall blushed.

" I did not." He said sounding offended. James took out his phone from his pocket and pressed a button. We heard a small noise and then some mumbling.

" _Jessica... Jess... No Jess... Don't leave..._" You could clearly hear that it was Kendall speaking. His face turned red and he pointed a finger at James.

" You delete that!" He exclaimed. " If Jess ever heard that she'll laugh at me and I'll just look like a fool!"

" So it is you then?" James smirked and Kendall was just about to jump him and beat him when I stepped between them.

" Calm down you guys. We need to get to the studio now." I said and they nodded. Kendall just closed his eyes.

" Are you okay dude?" Carlos asked and then I took a long look at Kendall. He was kind of pale.

" I'm feeling sick again." He said grabbing his head.

" Maybe it'll pass." James said.

" Yeah you're right. It should pass soon." Kendall said and took the car keys. " I'll wait for you guys in the car." He grabbed his jacket and walked out of the apartment and I turned to Carlos and James.

" This isn't good for him." I stated.

" He can't pretend like everything is okay. You saw the way he looked at Jessica when she walked in holding Jeremy's hand." Carlos added.

" And you're not making it better." I told James who frowned.

" I was just joking around." He said.

" And it hurt him. Didn't you see how worried he got?" Carlos argued. James nodded.

" Fine, I'll stop messing with him. But I was just being honest you know. He loves Jess and he just wont admit it." I rolled my eyes.

" It's because she has a boyfriend! He can't just walk up to her and tell her how he feels and expect her to break up with Jeremy. He doesn't want her to have to chose and that is why he doesn't tell her." Both Carlos and James nodded, agreeing with me.

" Well did you see Jessica?" James asked and Carlos and I looked at him. " She didn't even look Kendall in the eyes, meaning she cares about him too."

" You don't know that." Carlos said. " Maybe she just didn't want to make things worse for him."

" But she does love him." I suddenly said. They both blinked once.

" Love?" They asked at the same time and I nodded.

" Her face, when she walked out of Kendall's room told me that something isn't right with her. She is worried. She has a decision to make even if no one has made her make it yet. When Kendall almost kissed her last night she might have developed feelings for him. Or she might have had them before. I mean we all know she liked Kendall for a while back in Minnesota." James nodded.

" You're right. She blushed every single time he spoke to her."

" That was in third grade James!" Carlos said and I shook my head.

" But it was like that the months before we left Minnesota too. We all knew they texted each other every night back then. Maybe something happened that we didn't know about?" I said and Carlos seemed to be thinking about it.

" No, we would have noticed if they changed. You're probably right though, Jess felt something for Kendall before we left Minnesota and I'm pretty sure Kendall had begun to feel something for her as well." I had to agree with Carlos on that one. Jess and I have always been close. James and Jess had also been close, but more like a brother and sister. On second thought we had all been close to her. She was one of my best friends and she still is. There was just one thing that happened right before we boarded that plane to come to L.A. Kendall hesitated.

At first even I didn't understand why, but then I understood when he stopped and turned around to look at Jessica. It had been almost like he was afraid that he would lose her forever, like he would never meet her again and that he knew that she would move on. We all know she did and as much as we want to hate Jeremy for that we can't, because he is a good guy.

" Whatever man." James said, taking me out of my thoughts. " Let's just get to the studio before Kendall hurts himself in the car." The way he said it made both me and Carlos understand that he was serious. There was no way that we could know what Kendall might do now. Heartbreak can be awful, but when you still haven't realized that you love the person, it might be even worse. The only thing I- _we all _could hope for now, is that Kendall doesn't do anything stupid and that he and Jessica work everything out.

Or is that too much to hope for?

_**(Kendall's Point of View)**_

They still hadn't left when I got to the car.

I was glaring at them as they kissed once again before getting into the car. _Can't they see there are children around? Why are they kissing in public? _The thoughts seemed to escape my mind before I could stop them, no matter how much I wanted to. They where talking now. Then some more kissing, and after that just a little bit more.

_Whatever._

Even if I tried to hide that my heart broke with every kiss, every touch I couldn't anymore. I was tired of them being the perfect couple. I could have that too. And I was going to get it. I picked up my phone as they drove off and pressed in the right number. I hesitated, my thumb hovering over the green button, but finally pressed it as I waited for someone to answer.

One ring, two, thre- She picked up.

" _Hello?_" She asked, her voice just as I remembered it. I smiled to myself.

" Hey, it's me Kendall." I say and the person on the other line laughs.

" _Kendall? Hi, long time right?_" I smirk.

" Yeah. So I heard you got that acting job, in that new TV show." Once again she laughs.

" _Yes I did. I got the flowers you sent me, I just didn't have time to call and say thank you. I've been kind of busy signing contracts and stuff. Anything new going on?_" I looked towards the road that Jeremy and Jessica had driven.

" I was wondering if you're up for a new acting job? Just as a side project of course." I knew that she could hear in my voice that something was wrong.

" _What do you want me to do Kendall?_" She asked and I closed my eyes, not believing what I was about to say.

" I want you to pretend to be my girlfriend Jo."

_**To Be Continued...**_

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**_A/N: Uh-oh... What do you think will happen next? why the heck would Kendall call Jo? What do you think? =D_**

**_I just somehow needed Jo and Jessica to meet you know. That's why I did this. Do you think I'll go through with it? yes? No? maybe? Will Jo go along with it all?_**

**_Review and tell me what you thought of the chapter! =D Help me pass that 100th review! =D_**

**_Love you guys! 3_**

**_xoxo_**

**_Spicy_**


	19. Chapter 18

**_A/N: Okay I know that I mentioned in Summer Trouble I was going to take a break on this story and TGND. But I just checked them over and noticed that I actually had one chapter extra on this one which means that I decided to post if, just because it's been such a long time. I do hope you like it and remember this story is now officially on a break but as soon as I finish Summer trouble I'll make it top priority to finish this one as well! :D_**

**_DISCLAIMER: I don't own BTR! I just own Jessica and Jeremy and any OC mentioned!_**

* * *

_Previously..._

"_**Anything new going on?**" I looked towards the road that Jeremy and Jessica had driven._

_" I was wondering if you're up for a new acting job? Just as a side project of course." I knew that she could hear in my voice that something was wrong._

_" **What do you want me to do Kendall?**" She asked and I closed my eyes, not believing what I was about to say._

_" I want you to pretend to be my girlfriend Jo."_

_

* * *

**(Kendall's Point of View... Still...)**_

"_You want me to do what now?_" Jo asked as I looked around, to see if anyone heard me.

"I want you to pretend to be my girlfriend." I said again.

"_So I did hear you right._"

"Yeah."

"_May I ask why?_" I could hear in her voice that she was amused.

"Well, there is this girl-"

"_Ah, so there's a girl involved._" I rolled my eyes.

"Will you just listen to me? How about we meet after my recording time in the studio and then we can talk about everything, what do you say?"

"_Sure Kendall, I'd love to meet my ex-boyfriend and help him get together with a new girl, probably from the Palm Woods._" She was sarcastic and I knew I had to tell her the truth.

"It's Jessica." The line went silent. "Jo? You there?"

"_Oh yeah, right._" She said as if being woken up. "_Isn't Jessica that friend you told me about?_" She asked and I nodded.

"Yep. Can we please just talk about this in private?"

"_Alright Kendall, for old times sake, we'll meet up and I'll hear what you have to say. So how about six tonight?_" I checked my watch.

"Yeah, that would be reasonable. We'll meet at that little café where they have those marshmallow chocolate covered cookies." She laughed and I couldn't help but smile.

"_You always loved those._" She said and I had to agree.

"Still do."

"_So at six then?_" She asked confirming it.

"Yeah. See you there."

"_You too, bye Kendall!_"

"Bye." Then I hung up. I turned around and spotted Logan, Carlos and James walking out of the building. "Finally you guys decided to come." I say as they approach.

"Yeah yeah, just get into the car so that we can get to Rocque Records before Gustavo throws a fit." James said and we got into the car and drove off. I looked out the window, thinking of what the day would bring and most importantly, how Jessica would feel when she found out about me and Jo.

_**(James' Point of View)**_

Kendall was acting kind of weird the whole car ride. He kept checking his phone as if he wanted to call someone, or was expecting a call, or maybe even as if he was regretting something. When Carlos pointed it out he became really defensive which only made it even clearer that he was hiding something.

"Kendall could you please just put your phone down for one second?" Logan asked and Kendall jumped in his seat.

"What phone? I don't have a phone! Who said anything? Look! A squirrel!" Then he hid his phone in the pocket and looked away at a pretend squirrel on the highway.

We where now walking up the stairs at Rocque Records and he was holding his phone in a secure grip. We arrived perfectly to hear Jessica finish her song.

"_Ooh ooh, yeah yeah yeah  
When you you kiss me  
Yeah yeah yeah  
When you kiss me_" She finished and I looked at Kendall. He didn't even look at her! This was going way to far somehow. The two of them were best friends. They shouldn't be acting like this! We had to do something- fast- Otherwise they might never be happy again.

_**(Jessica's Point of View)**_

I knew I had made a mistake. Believe me, the guilt was almost too much to bear. It was just that when I saw Jeremy smiling at me from the other side of the glass I couldn't help but feel bad. When Kendall and the others arrived it just made things worse. I needed to mask up my feelings towards Kendall but I just couldn't help but look at him once in a while. I think Jeremy might have noticed because he asked me several times if I was okay.

"Yes. Of course. Why wouldn't I be?" I asked and he just shrugged and kissed me softly. He was killing me! No not Jeremy- Kendall. The way he looked made me feel guilty, which I probably should be feeling, but still!

"I need some air Gustavo." I said and passed him walking out of the recording booth.

"No!" Gustavo yelled startling me.

"Excuse me?" I said politely.

"Gustavo, just let the poor girl take a break." Kelly said but the big man just shook his head.

"First it'll be air, then it'll be a car and the next thing you know, YOU'LL BE LIVING IN A SHOEBOX BECAUSE YOU CAN'T AFFORD TO STAY IN YOUR OWN MANSION!" He let out a deep breath and glared at me.

"Uhm?" I didn't know what to say so I just sat down on the assigned seat. Kelly looked at the watch.

"Gustavo, her recording time is over anyway. It's the boys turn now."

"I need them to try out a new song. _Together._" I stared at him and jumped when someone sprayed out water on me. I turned around and saw Kendall, beet red in his face.  
"Sorry Jessica." He mumbled and I suppressed a gasp, which James didn't. Kendall never called me Jessica unless he was either serious, mad or sad. I think it was the last one in this case.

"It's okay. I needed a shower anyway." I joked lamely, but Kendall just turned his head away.

"Okay, five minute break so that Jessica can get cleaned up and Kendall you help her!" Gustavo ordered. I was just about to protest but he barked (yes barked) at me and I knew I didn't have another choice.

Kendall walked fifteen steps behind me. I counted them. Every single time he took one more, he stopped for a second before continuing. I stomped into the men's bathroom and Kendall followed me.

"Will you just stop it already?" I snapped when he closed the door after us.

"What Jessica? Tell me what I have to stop?"

"Making me feel guilty!"

"Why do you feel guilty?" It was his turn to snap at me.

"Because! My boyfriend is here! And he _loves _me!" Kendall turned red. This time out of anger, I think.

"I'm not doing anything Jessica. If you feel guilty, then don't. I certainly do not because I feel absolutely nothing. For." I stared at him as he finished. "_You_." Why did my heart just shatter?

"I don't feel anything for you either Kendall." I said, trying to stay confident. "At least not in _that _way."

"Then what way do you feel something?" he was calming down. I could see it.

"You are my best friend Kendall. You always have been, you always will be. I want us to be us. I want us to stay friends forever. I don't want us to fight over some silly little thing that almost happened." A tear fell down. "I'm so sorry I yelled at you. I hope you can forgive me." And with that I left. I walked out of the bathroom and walked back to the studio where Gustavo and the others where waiting.

"Let's try the song out now!" Gustavo said and gave me the lyrics. Jeremy wrapped his arm around me.

"You okay?" He asked and I nodded.

"Yeah." I said and kissed him softly. _Then why does kissing him feel so wrong?_

**(_Kendall's Point of View)_**

How could I have said that to her? That I felt nothing for her? I knew I did. I freaking love her! Not that I can tell her that. Screw that. I ran after her, trying to catch up so that I could tell her how I really felt but unfortunately she was already in Jeremy's arms and had just kissed him in front of me. Maybe calling Jo wasn't such a bad idea after all.

"Get in that recording booth now and start singing already!" Gustavo barked at us and we couldn't say no. I grabbed the lyrics from him and got into the booth and then we began to sing.

About two hours later we were done recording and Gustavo gave us the rest of the day off. I looked at Jessica and saw her glance at me before walking out with Jeremy. I ignored the others and walked out after them.

"Jessica!" I yelled. They were obviously walking really fast because they were already by the elevators. "Wait a second!" I ran up to them and looked at Jeremy who was wearing a confused look on his face. " Could you just excuse us for a moment?" I asked politely and he nodded.

"I'll be down by the car." he said and Jessica nodded as he kissed her cheek. When he entered the elevator and the doors closed Jessica looked at me but she didn't speak.

"Okay so I just wanted to say that I'm sorry." She raised an eyebrow at me. "I'm sorry for everything I said and did. I feel the same way about you." I said and she looked confused.

"What?"

"The being friends part. You too are my best friend," I stopped for a second before continuing when I saw her smile. "and I love you for that. I don't want things to be weird between us. I want us to be us too. So I'll forgive you if you forgive me. For being such a jerk to you." With her small smile I didn't know if she was happy, amused or just thought I was crazy. "Jess? Will you please say somethin-" She pressed her lips against my cheek making me stop my talking.

"Yes." She finally said and embraced me in a tight hug. I hugged her back without thinking twice about it and kissed the top of her head. When we pulled away she smiled widely. "So I'll see you in the Palm Woods then?" She asked and I looked at my watch.

"Actually, I kind of have a thing with a someone soon and I-"

"Are you going on a date with someone?" She asked in a low voice. I stared at her.

"Uh. I don't know if you should call it a date really-"

"So it is a date then?" She crossed her arms over her chest.

"Well I guess-"

"Okay then Kendall. You don't have to tell me. I just thought that we-"

"We what?" I asked her and she frowned.

"That we told each other everything." She bit her lip and I felt myself going mad inside.

"Okay. I'm going on a date with a girl. You don't know her. At least I don't think you do." I told her and she smiled at me, sadly? Why was she sad?

"Oh. I guess I'll see you later then. After your something with your someone." She said and waved at me slightly. " Bye Kendall." she said and pressed the down button on the elevator and disappeared from my view.

_**(Jessica's Point of View)**_

_Oh my God. I'm so stupid! _The thought couldn't disappear out of my head. _Of course he was seeing someone! He's just amazing, funny, talented, incredible, cute and just pure AWESOME! _I shook my head at myself. I needed to get over him. It had just been a small crush in third grade. _And fourth, fifth, then seventh and in ninth too. Oh don't forget RIGHT BEFORE THEY LEFT! **Shut up.**_ I walked out of Rocque Records and walked to the car where Jeremy was waiting.

"I know you might think I'm boring right now, but are you okay?" He asked and I smiled at him.

"I don't think you're boring. I think you are amazing, incredibly cute and very thoughtful." I smiled and he smiled back. "And yes, everything is okay now."

"So something was wrong then?" He asked me and I nodded. "Something with Kendall right?" I gulped but nodded.

"Yes."

"Do you want to explain?" I nodded once again.

"Kendall and I have just had a fiew things going on that have been very stressful and we got into an argument. But he apologized and I apologized so now everything is alright again." Jeremy didn't ask any other questions. He just nodded and smiled at me, like he always did.

"I'm glad you solved it then." he said and I nodded once more.

"Me too."

_**(Kendall's Point of View)**_

It took a fiew minutes before I could shake off James, Carlos and Logan. They were all curious when I said I wouldn't be going with them to the Palm Woods. I was now sitting in the café Jo and I had agreed on meeting in. Soon I heard the small bell ding and looked up only to see Jo enter. She looked around and spotted me. She smiled widely and walked over to my table. I stood up and hugged her.

"God Kendall. I missed you so much!" She said and laughed.

"I missed you too Jo." I chuckled and she kissed my cheek.

"Great. I hoped you did. So now tell me about the situation." She ordered and I nodded telling her everything. I began from when we left Minnesota and all the way to today and Jo didn't interrupt me a single time. I suddenly remembered why we had such a great relationship. She listened to me and unlike other people she didn't ask many questions afterward.

"And now you want me to pretend to be your girlfriend, so that you can make Jessica jealous?" She asked and I shook my head.

"I don't want to make her jealous... I just want to-"

"-make her jealous?" She asked again and I sighed.

"Yeah..." She tilted her head slightly to the side.

"Okay then." She said, finally clapping her hands together.

"Wait? Are you agreeing with me? 'No, Kendall that's really immature' or ' Why don't you just move on Kendall'?" I asked and she shrugged.

"No, I don't really have anything to do now anyway. My TV-show is on a break and that means that I'm on a break." She said putting her hands under her chin and smiling sweetly. "So let's just start with this thing right now. You can drive me to the Palm Woods and then you can kiss my cheek when she sees us." Jo said, somewhat excited.

"But you don't live there anymore, remember?" I asked her and she nodded.  
"I am going to live there for this month before we begin filming again." She told me.

"What a coincidence." I mumbled and she nodded.

"Believe me Kendall, before this month is over Jessica will be so jealous that steam comes out of her ears every time she sees you." I nodded and smirked.

"I sure hope so."

I drove Jo to the Palm Woods, just like planned. We walked into the lobby side by side and in less than a second all eyes were on us. We looked at each other and she smiled at me and put her hand in mine as we walked through the hallway together. Whispers filled the room and some were pointing and nodding. I heard a fiew camera phones flashes and knew this would be something big on the internet. We walked up to the elevator and just as the door opened someone with brown hair knocked into me. The person looked up at me and I stared into her eyes. She backed away startled and looked down at our intertwined hands. She stared at me again. I offered her a small smile and looked at the person next to her too.

"Jess, Jeremy. This is Jo-" I began and trailed of looking at Jo. She nodded and I gathered some confidence. I cleared my throat and stood up straight. "-my girlfriend." Very slowly Jessica opened her mouth to say something and then closed it quickly, not really knowing what to say. Jeremy looked between me and Jessica and for once he didn't say a single word.

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**_A/N: Uh-oh... :O What's going to happen now? Well, I'm sorry to say this but you'll have to wait for a while. This will just be a Hiatus but as I promised, I WILL write more as soon as I finish Summer Trouble!_**

**_If you REVIEW I might even finish that story faster and write more on this one! ;)_**

**_Thank you to all of you who have read, reviewed, put this story and me on favorite/alert! I love you guys for that! :) In a totally non creepy way ;)_**

**_Happy New Year BTW! :D_**

**_Review now! Please and Thank you!_**

**_xoxo_**

**_Spicy_**


	20. Chapter 19

**_A/N: Hi everyone! It's been such a long, long time since I updated MBF but here I am again! :) I know this chapter is short but I just wrote it quickly so that I could post something for you to read. I am still waiting on enough reviews on Summer Trouble so that I can figure out what I want to do with James and Abby ;) So if you haven't reviewed already, go and do so! Everything is explained in the A/N of the last updated chapter._**

**_Now back to this story. So Jessica and Kendall. Hmm... What do I have planned for them? I guess you'll just have to keep reading to find out ;)_**

**_DISCLAIMER: I own nothing that has to do with BTR! I just own my OC's!_**

* * *

_**(Jessica's Point of View)**_

I stared blankly at them. Jo smiled at me extending her hand.

"You must be Jessica. Kendall has told me so much about you." She said and I numbly shook her hand.

"Really? Only good stuff I hope." Jeremy laughed and shaking her hand as well. "I'm Jeremy, Jessica's boyfriend. I had no idea Kendall and you were still seeing each other." He said crossing his arms. "I thought it ended after you got that full time job on _New Town High_?" Jo and Kendall laughed.

"Yeah, but we met a couple of days ago and kind of reconnected." Kendall said wrapping an arm around Jo's waist. I felt sick. I still hadn't said anything yet.

"Well that's great. We can all double date." _Why did you say that? _"I mean, we could just go tonight!" _Nice save, now they think you're much cooler... NOT! _"I mean, I'm sorry." I said sighing deeply. "It's just that you caught me off guard. Kendall never even told me that you two were seeing each other again." I said and finally got myself together. Kendall was staring at me and so was Jeremy. Jo seemed to be the only one who didn't. She just smiled.

"It's okay. Kendall and I would love to double date." She said just as the elevator opened again and Carlos, James and Logan sprung out of it.

"Kendall! Kendall!" Carlos said.

"There are-" James began.

"-false rumors-" Logan continued.

"-spreading on the internet about-" Carlos said again.

"-you and Jo dating again!" They exclaimed at the same time. They stared at him with wide eyes and Jo cleared her throat. I stayed quiet and watched what happened next with big eyes.

"Not now Jo, we just asked Kendall some- JO?" They jumped and James shrieked as if he had seen a monster. We all looked at him confused and he popped his fake collar and glared.

"What? I'm shocked." Was all he said. They turned back to look at Jo.

"What are you doing here?" Logan asked, trying to stay polite. Jo looked at Kendall and smiled looking back at Logan.

"I'm dating Kendall." She explained. They looked at Kendall and Jo with a blank expression.

"Oh." They said at the same time.

"Well, it's-" Carlos offered a small smile. "-_good _to have you back Jo." He said and shook her hand. They all looked at him strangely.

"Thank you Carlos." Jo smiled, even if that was a '_I'm-not-so-sure-you're-happy-though_'- smile. Logan and James just gave her a awkward hug and looked at me. I still hadn't said anything since they had arrived.

"So, we'll see you guys tonight then?" Jo asked looking at Jeremy and me.

"Uh, Yes." I answered, and smiled at Jo. "Bye for now. Jeremy and I were just heading for the studio anyway." I explained to them, taking Jeremy's hand.

"She's trying out a new song with Gustavo." Jeremy smiled proudly, looking at me with admiration. _Urgh! Stop being so Goddamn wonderful!_ All I did was nod once curtly.

"Bye guys." I said and looked at Kendall one last time. His arm was still around Jo's waist. It made me feel sick for some reason. I felt like I wasn't wanted here anymore. Like Kendall never really cared. I felt used and cheated on. Then I thought of something.

That was probably what Jeremy would feel like if he ever found out about me and Kendall...

...And the fact that I think I might possibly like him as more than a friend.

_**(Kendall's Point of View)**_

Jo smiled at me and stood on her tiptoes and kissed me on the cheek. I smiled at her but my eyes still drifted off to where Jessica had left. _Why does she have to be so Goddamn beautiful?_ I asked my self mentally. Suddenly Jo's phone blasted off in some crazy ring tone.

"Oh, I have to get this. I'll meet you later okay? I have to see Camille anyway." She smiled and kissed me again before walking off to the pool. I turned around and saw James, Carlos and Logan crossing their arms at me and giving me a look.

"I can totally explain this..." I said trailing off. Before they had a chance to say anything I bolted. I ran to the elevator and got in. I had to get to the apartment! The doors closed just as they appeared in front of me. I waved at them just like Jessica had when we were following her. When the elevator doors opened I ran straight for the apartment. I opened it and sat locked the door, sighting deeply. Then I turned around and screamed.

"Hi Kendall." James said smugly. _Dammit. I forgot the stairs are faster here._

"Hi."I simply said and walked over to the kitchen to get something to drink. I settled on water and the guys followed me.

"What the hell is going on?" James asked, leaning on the fridge. "You and _Jo_? You guys broke up because you found out that you just loved each other as brother and sister." Carlos grabbed a glass and filled it with orange juice for himself.

"And it's weird to get together with your sister." He stated, sipping from his glass. I rolled my eyes and shrugged.

"We just connected again. I really like her." I told them and Logan raised an eyebrow at me.

"People's feelings don't just change...like...that..." Logan had trailed off and was now staring with a blank face at me. James and Carlos waved their hands in front of his face and suddenly he jumped, smiling. "You're just doing this to get Jessica _jealous_! Aren't you?" He exclaimed and I stared at him.

"What? No!" I said and laughed uneasily. Of course I couldn't lie to my best friend(s). Well unless their name was Jessica Blake.

"You _are_?" All three of them asked at the same time. I looked at them and finally sighed.

"Yes." They all grinned widely at me. "I know, I know. Kendall is so pathetic because he fell in love with a girl who is not _just _his best friend, but also isn't _single._ I am so stupid." I said sadly. Then all hell broke loose.

"Did you just say _love_?" Logan asked.

"So you admit that you like her?" James said.

"I still don't get it..." Carlos mumbled but then his eyes widened. "Oh My God! You said _in love_!" He exclaimed.

"Why would you try to make her jealous? Don't you see she likes you too..." The voices kept going after that but I wasn't there anymore.

Jessica burst through the doors and looked at me. She had tears running down her cheeks. I looked back at her. She walked closer to me and suddenly, everyone was quiet. It was just her and I there in the room.

"I just have to tell you." She said, her voice nearly breaking. I cupped her face and looked her in the eyes. Her deep brown pools of chocolate.

"Tell me what Jess?" I asked her. She gave me a small smile.

"I love you." Then she leaned up and I leaned down, meeting her halfway in a kiss of pure love. She pulled away after exactly 14 seconds- I counted them- and looked at me. "Kendall?" She asked and I stared blankly. "Kendall! KENDALL!"

I snapped out of my daydream and looked at the guys again. They were staring at me and I looked away for a second. Did I just daydream that Jessica had told me that she loved me?

"I think I really like her." I told them and they looked at me.

"Who? Jess or Jo?" Logan asked as I gave him a look.

"Who do you think?" I asked and now he gave me a look.

"You really shouldn't try to make her jealous Kendall. It will all just end badly for all of you." He told me and I nodded.

"I just need to show her that I'm over her." I lied. "That's why I'm doing this. I think she knows that I like her and she might think this will become and obstacle for us if we try to work together. I just need to prove to her that I don't like her anymore and that we can work together." Somewhere in my mind, it all made sense. Logan still seemed skeptical but James and Carlos seemed to have bought it.

"Okay. Just don't mess things up." Logan said, finally giving up. "And enjoy your double date then." He told me and I just nodded curtly before walking off to get ready.

* * *

Jo called me five minutes ago and I'm now waiting for her to show up so that we can meet Jessica and Jeremy at the restaurant. Pretending to still be in love with Jo would be a problem since we both agreed that we thought of each other more as a brother and sister but I knew I had to suck it up so that I could prove to Jessica that we could be professional. I sighed deeply. _I love her and that is why I'm doing this. __**And to make her jealous. **__Yes. __**You're not even denying it! **__I know... _A knock on the door interrupted my thoughts. I quickly stood up and went to open the door and once I did, my jaw dropped. Jo was standing there, wearing a light blue cocktail dress and silver high-heels. Her blond hair was curled and there was a silver clip, keeping her side bangs from falling over her eyes. Her makeup was light and she looked absolutely amazing.

"Hi." She smiled.

"Hi." I smiled back. _Maybe pretending won't be so hard after all..._

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**A/N: Oh no! Is Kendall falling for Jo again? :O I'm the only one that knows ;) hehe. Reviews? Just so you know, this doesn't mean that this story is gonna get more chapters faster because Summer Trouble hasn't ended yet. I want to finish that one first but I just HAD to give you this chapter :) Hope you liked it! Please leave some reviews ;)**

**xoxo**

**Spicy**


	21. Chapter 20

_**A/N: Oh my God... You can not believe what I just did! After I updated TGND I began writing the A/N for this story. After I had finished and was just about to update when I realized I had uploaded the WRONG chapter! :O I know! I had been writing my butt off writing on the A/N for chapter 21 and then I realized that I had to update **this **chapter FIRST! :D That is like so typical me, but I hope you'll like this anyway ^^ Hahaha xD**_

_**So enjoy!**_

_**DISCALIMER: I own nothing that has to do with BTR! I just own my own characters!**_

* * *

_**(Kendall's Point of View)**_

"Kendall, you need to relax." Jo told me as we walked into the restaurant. "This thing will work perfectly, I promise. By the end of the month Jessica will be head over heals in love with you." She told me and I nodded.

"Jo, I've been thinking and maybe this was all just a stupid plan. You know I sometimes get ahead of myself." I told her and she just chuckled.

"Kendall tell me. Do you love her?" She asked me and I frowned.

"Yes, but I don't think this is the right way to-" She put a finger to my lips and I stopped talking.

"If you love her, she loves you back. All you need to do is push her towards the edge and then she'll admit it herself." Jo whispered. "And smile now and pretend that we were interrupted." I raised a confused eyebrow but suddenly realized what she was talking about. Jeremy and Jessica were walking towards us and I struggled not to get caught staring at Jessica. Unlike Jo, who was wearing a light blue cocktail dress, Jessica was wearing an elegant black dress with long sleeves. The material looked soft and was sparkling a little. I noticed that her back was bare and that Jeremy had his arms right at her waist which made me want to-

"Hi Jo, hello Kendall." Jeremy said and took Jo's hand kissing it lightly.

"Jeremy." Jo smiled and curtsied a little. "It's a beautiful evening for a double date. Let's go inside shall we?" She turned to look at me and I smiled at her.

"Let's." I said and offered her my arm. She gladly accepted it and we walked inside, shortly followed by Jessica and Jeremy.

My Jessica-sense was tingling, there were butterflies in my stomach and I just couldn't stop looking at her. She was just so beautiful and amazing that I couldn't- I couldn't-

I don't even know anymore. All I know is that dinner went by pretty quickly and that Jo and I managed to keep the act up long enough for both Jessica and Jeremy to believe that we were totally in love with each other again. The problem was of course that every time I kissed Jo's cheek, Jessica would look at me strangely. I didn't understand a single thing that Jo and Jeremy talked about. Somehow they seemed to have the exact same interests and began to chat about it while Jessica and I just had to listen to them and laugh sometimes or just smile. Apparently Jeremy never liked hockey that much either and that got both me and Jessica to get involved in the conversation.

"I don't know how you guys can even say that hockey is bad." I said and Jessica nodded agreeing with me.

"It's because it's simply boring honey." Jo said, smiling at me.

"No it's not!" Jessica exclaimed. "Even if I never played it, it was the best part of being friends with the guys. Getting free tickets to go and see their championship games or just sitting front row and having to duck from the puck when Carlos smashed it to hard." She said and I couldn't help but chuckle. Carlos had done that a couple of times and once Jessica had been distracted and didn't have time to duck. She pointed to her temple. "A small concussion from falling off the seat and hitting my head on the cement and seven stitches from where the puck landed." She said proudly and I high-fived her. I loved seeing that side of her. In fact, I loved all of her sides.

"Yeah, I remember that incident. It just made me think that hockey was even more stupid because of it's recklessness." Jeremy said and wrapped his arm around her shoulder. "I remember I couldn't understand how such a pretty girl would even be near that field but then I heard who had been playing and I understood." His eyes rested on me for a second but then he turned back to Jessica and kissed her cheek. I felt sick again.

_**(Jessica's Point of View)**_

"So, Jessica. Tell me about yourself." Jo said politely and I smiled a little.

"I thought you said Kendall had told you 'so much about me' already, what else is there to know?" I asked her and she looked at me. I smiled a little to hide my slight bitterness.

"Well for starters how about you tell me about your family? Kendall only told me about your relationship." I froze. "I mean as friends of course." She corrected herself and I let out a small breath making sure that no one heard it.

"Well, my dad works at a car company back in Minnesota and my mom is bridal-shop manager. They got divorced a couple of years ago but are still good friends." I explained. Kendall looked up at me.

"You never told me they got divorced." He told me and I shrugged.

"I didn't see how it was any of your business." I said before I could stop myself.

"Well it is my business if you get sad over it and I need to comfort you." He shot back.

"No it isn't." I snapped. "It isn't any of your business and I simply didn't want to talk about it with anyone. Besides, you were to busy with the band anyway." I said and he leaned back in his chair defeated. I knew it was low to bring the three-year-long hiatus of our friendship but I was desperate to show him that I didn't need him.

"I think it's best we drop the subject." Jeremy said, taking my hand under the table. I nodded and took a sip from my drink.

"Yeah, that's probably best." Jo agreed. "And you Jeremy? What have you been up to while Jessica was here in L.A?" She asked and he smiled telling her about getting into business with my dad and then deciding to open up a new office here in L.A to be closer to me. While he and Jo chatted up, I glared at Kendall and he glared back at me. For a few minutes we didn't say anything. We just listened to Jeremy and Jo but then I felt really bad for acting the way I did. I knew I just had to say something.

"Kendall, did Gustavo say anything about that new song?" I asked, trying to make him forget about our little fight earlier.

"Oh, yeah. I forgot to tell you. He called and said that we would be performing in a month or so on Shirley Williams' show." I felt my heart beat a little faster.

"How could you have forgotten to tell me about such a thing! You know that is my favorite show in the entire world!" I said excited.

"Yeah, I know. That's why I wanted to tell you once we got back home tonight. I wanted it to be a surprise." He said and winked at me. I knew I would blush so I simply stood up.

"Excuse me, I need to powder my nose." I said in a mock English voice.

"I'll come with you." Jo said quickly. "Kendall, be nice and talk to Jeremy." She said and kissed his cheek. I waited for her and then we walked off together.

As soon as I walked through the door my nostrils filled with a strawberry aroma. The lights were dim and there were candles lit in the corners. The walls were cream-colored and decorated with different paintings on the theme love. I walked over to the sink and washed my hands while Jo stood and watched me intently. I knew something was going through her mind and she was trying to figure out the best way to say it to me. I also knew that Jo wouldn't be so upfront about what she wanted to ask, and she was nice so I didn't think I would have anything to worry about.

"So how long have you been in love with my boyfriend?" She asked and I froze.

_Damn._

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_**A/N: CLIFFHANGER WARNING! CLIFFHANGER WARNING! So what did you think? =) Did you like it? I really hope you did because I would really love some reviews ^^' What do you think will happen ;)**_

_** Anyway if you read my A/N in chapter 18 of TGND you know that it might take a while to update because I have to write the chapters and I don't really have much time to do it even if Summer has started. Wow... Summer... I just looked out the window and it's raining and the wind is blowing and everything is just like... Dark...? Anyway, I have to work this weekend at my dad's restaurant and that is kind of because he saved me with this all new computer and because I love him sooooooo much for that! So you really have to thank my dad because if he hadn't gotten me this computer I might not have updated in a long, LONG time x) Thank you daddy 3**_

_**So that was it =) Once again, if you like The vampire Diaries or the Pirates of the Caribbean movies then you should check out my other stories as well =) I think I've done good by updating two of my stories and now I just want to sit down, watch som Project Runway and listen to the rain outside ^^**_

_**Have a great day/night you guys!**_

_**xoxo**_

_**Spicy**_


	22. Chapter 21

_**A/N: Hey! Last time I left you guys with a tiny bit of a cliffhanger there after Jo confronted Jessica about her feelings for Kendall. Now you'll find out if Jess managed to do a save or just cracked under pressure ;) Hope you like it!**_

_**Enjoy!**_

_**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing that has to do with BTR! I just own my own characters!**_

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_**(Jessica's Point of View)**_

The water was still running. The sink was almost filled with it and I didn't know what to do. It was just me and her in the entire bathroom and in these lights she actually looked mad at me. I turned of the sink and turned around, smiling.

"Jo? What are you talking about?" I asked her and she frowned.

"I've seen the way you've been looking at him all night long." She told me. My heart kept speeding up. "And the way he's been looking at you." I closed my eyes.

"Jo, there is nothing going on between me and Kendall. I promise. I have it all under control." I said and she looked at me with big eyes.

"So there is something to keep under control?" She asked and I realized I had slipped.

"No, I'm just saying that if there was anything, I would have it under control. You have nothing to worry about." I told her.

"What about Jeremy? Does he have something to worry about? Because the looks you and Kendall share are looks anyone would give the one they love. It's the way Jeremy looks at you Jessica." She told me and I grabbed my head. "You have one more chance to tell me the truth or I'll go and tell Jeremy that I suspect you had an affair with Kendall while he was in Minnesota." I snapped my head in her direction.

"Fine. Do you want to know the truth?" I asked and she nodded. "Don't get mad at me." I begged her and she shook her head.

"I wont. Just tell me the truth, the entire truth."

"You can't tell anyone. Not Jeremy. Not James, Logan or Carlos. And most importantly, you can't tell Kendall." Once again she nodded and I had to take a deep breath. "I love Jeremy but I also love Kendall." I admitted biting my lip. Jo looked at me and then looked away.

"So you love Kendall?" She asked and I nodded.

_**(Jo's Point of View)**_

What a mess I have got myself into this time. Not only do I have to pretend to be my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend but I also just got the girl he loves to admit that she loves him too. Oh boy.

"It's okay Jessica." I told her. "Thank you for at least being honest with me." I said smiling at her but she had gotten teary eyed already.

"I love Kendall but not as anything more than a friend and I am sick and tired of people suggesting otherwise." She broke down in tears and I ran up to her and embraced her.

"No, shh... Don't cry Jessica. You'll ruin your makeup." I tried and she chuckled a little.

"Why are you so nice to me?" She asked, confused. "Why is everyone nice to me but at the same time trying to get me to admit that I love Kendall as more than a friend?" I couldn't do anything else but shrug.

"I don't know Jessica, but I do know that you shouldn't care. Just be honest with yourself and everything else will just fall into place. I'm sorry if I've upset you." I smiled at her and she smiled back, still a little teary eyed.

"Thank you Jo." She said and looked at me sadly. "Thank you."

_**(Kendall's Point of View)**_

Jessica and Jo had been gone for a long time now and I had begun to get worried. Jeremy and I couldn't think of anything to speak of since we didn't have anything in common. He looked around a little awkwardly and I looked down at my phone. He took a sip from his drink and I looked around. That was pretty much how the past few minutes had gone and I was getting tired of he routine.

"So Kendall. What kind of movies do you like to watch?" He asked me and I looked ta him.

"Uh- I have never been one for movies but comedies I guess and horror movies too if a girl is with me." Jeremy looked at me strangely at first but then grinned.

"That reminds me of when I took Jessica to see a horror movie at the cinema." I raised an eyebrow.

"You got Jess to watch a horror movie with you?" I asked in disbelief. There was no way in hell that he had actually managed to do something like that. Jessica was terrified by horror movies and she hated it whenever one of our teachers made us look at them in school.

"I could hardly believe it myself when it happened, but she was angry with me for a week after that and wouldn't speak of anything that had to do with scary things." He told me and I couldn't help but chuckle a little.

"That's so typical Jess." I chuckled again.

"Yeah, but she forgave me after I-" He stopped and his smile faded. "I'm sorry, that isn't something you would like to know." He said, giving me a hint. I balled my hands into fists and tried hard not to lose control. I wouldn't even want to think about what he had done to make her forgive him. I kept hoping that Jessica and Jo would just turn up again and for once in my life I got my way.

"Hey, you guys were gone for a long time." I said and Jo just smiled at me.

"We were fixing ourselves. Why? Did you miss me?" She asked and I knew that was my cue to nod. I had actually missed Jessica more but I couldn't let anyone know that,. Especially not Jessica.

Jo kissed my cheek and we continued with the dinner but once again Jo and Jeremy were the once talking while Jessica and I listened or looked at each other.

_**(Jessica's Point of View)**_

I could not understand that I had actually managed to stay alive through dinner. When Jo practically ambushed me in the bathroom I was worried that she might get the truth out of me. I somehow managed to lie through my teeth and she didn't even suspect a thing. It's amazing what a few tears can do to prove that you actually feel a way that you don't. Did that even make any sense? I didn't think so.

Anyway, we had just payed for dinner and walked out of the restaurant when Jo stopped us all from taking a step closer to our cars because she wanted to talk. She smiled at me while she took Kendall's hand and intertwined their fingers. I smiled back at her but inside I was dying.

"Okay, I have to admit that our first double-date actually went pretty darn good." She said proudly and something about that sentence bothered me.

"_First_?" I asked. "As in not last?" Jeremy took my hand and looked down at me.

"Jess, if I'm not going crazy I would think that you are actually worried about going on another date with Kendall and Jo." He mocked me and I smacked his arm.

"I am not worried." I said and turned to Jo and Kendall. "I am _not_ worried." I told them in a serious tone. "I'm just wondering why- I mean _when_ you'd like to have another date." I smiled and Jo smiled back at me while Kendall just looked at me slightly confused, just like Jeremy.

"Well I was thinking, maybe we could go to the arcade tomorrow? Or maybe a movie?" Jo suggested and I nodded.

"How about both?" I asked, trying to be a good sport. "Tomorrow the arcade and the day after that a movie?"

"You know what?" Jeremy said. "That sounds pretty good. I don't know about you guys but I really enjoyed talking to both of you." He said smiling at them, his bright blue eyes shining truthfully at them. Kendall chuckled, drawing my attention to him. His smiled dropped and he got quiet.

"I enjoyed it as well." He mumbled and I fake yawned.

"Oh I'm so sorry but I am really tired." I lied. "Can't we just talk about this tomorrow morning? I mean, we do live in the same hotel and we will probably meet when Kendall and I go to work tomorrow." I said.

"You know what? For the first time tonight, I think I'll actually agree with Jessica." Jeremy said and I smiled.

"For the first time?" I asked him and he leaned down and kissed my cheek. I smiled at him but for some reason my eyes traveled back to Kendall. He wasn't looking at us. He was looking down and his left hand was balled into a fist. _Oh Kendall_, I thought to myself but tried not to show that I had noticed anything out of the ordinary.

"Yes for the first time." Jeremy smiled at me and I just smiled back. "Let's meet up tomorrow for breakfast before Jess and Kendall have to go to work." He suggested.

"That sounds great." Jo smiled.

"It's a date." Kendall said.

"Great." I said but I wasn't really honest of what I thought. "Let's go Jer. Bye guys." I said and hugged Jo. I stepped forward to hug Kendall too but stopped for a second. He looked at me and I noticed how strange it must look for me not to be hugging one of my best friends, so I inhaled and hugged him too. Could hear his heart beating in his chest when his arms embraced me. Whenever I was with Jeremy, I felt happy but with Kendall it was different. Almost as if I belonged in his arms. I felt safe. Protected and loved, but I knew it was wrong for me to be feeling this way. I pulled away before anyone would suspect anything.

"Bye." I smiled at him and he smiled back, his white teeth shining.

"Bye Jess." He said and I turned around with Jeremy following me after saying goodbye. I sat down in the front passenger seat and sighed.

"Well that went well." Jeremy said and I nodded, but inwardly it felt as if I was going to throw up.

"Yes it did." I lied. "I just can't wait to get home to the Palmwood's and lay down in bed so I can get some sleep." I yawned. Jeremy had a small smile playing on his lips.

"Sleeping huh?" He asked and I turned my head in his direction and smacked him.

"I'm tired. I have to go to work tomorrow and record an all new song. It's not my fault Gustavo and Kelly have me on a strict schedule. Not just that but I have to write a all new song too and that's not exactly a walk in the park." I told him and he laughed at me.

"God you're so cranky all of the sudden. I just asked if you were really going to sleep. A simple 'yes' would have done perfectly fine." I smacked him again and looked out the window. It was dark outside and I tilted my head seeing a whole new side of L.A. It was amazing. I closed my eyes and soon I felt myself drifting off in a deep sleep...

_**(Kendall's Point of View)**_

I parked the car and sighed deeply, putting my head on the steering-wheel. I could feel Jo's eyes boring into my head but I just couldn't talk about the thing she wanted to talk about. The entire ride home she had been telling me what we should do next and I had completely forgotten why I was doing this in the first place.

"Kendall you can't keep looking at her as if you want to be kissing her in front of her boyfriend!" Jo said waking me up from my thoughts.

"But I _want _to be kissing her and I can't help it that she is always around Jeremy nowadays." I told her honestly and she stared.

"Oh my God Kendall. You will drive this plan into the dumpster if you don't get a grip." She said, face-palming herself.

"Fine. So I'll do better tomorrow then. I just couldn't help but feel like I wanted to beat the crap out of Jeremy tonight..." I said quietly but she caught me.

"What? Why? It's not exactly his fault that you love his girlfriend, is it? And not to mention the fact that he is kind of amazing himself. Didn't you hear of all the charity-work he did in Minnesota after Jessica left to come here? He sounds like the boyfriend anyone would like to have." She said thoughtfully. My eyes widened at her.

"Don't tell me you're crushing on him Jo!" I exclaimed in a slightly teasing voice.

"I am not crushing on him!" She said defensively. "I just think he is kind of the dream guy for any girl. Including me. I like the idea of having a guy like him, but that doesn't mean I like him." I narrowed my eyes at her and raised an eyebrow but she kept her face neutral.

"Okay." I said finally after a few seconds of contemplating. We got out of the car and walked into the hotel again. I stopped outside of her apartment door and smiled at her.

"I really did have a great time tonight." She told me. "Even if we were just pretending to be in love again, I realized how much fun we used to have, even when we were just friends." I nodded and hugged her.

"You must probably be one of the best ex-girlfriends a guy could ask for." I said and frowned at myself. "Okay that sounded really weird to say."

"Yeah." She agreed, still hugging me.

"Let's rephrase it then shall we? You are the best girl _friend _a guy could ever ask for." I emphasized the 'friend' part so it wouldn't be as weird as the last thing I had said and it seemed to work. We pulled apart from our hug and smiled at each other. "Breakfast tomorrow at eight?" I asked and she nodded.

"You bet. Just try not to look at Jessica too much alright?" She winked. "After all... You are in love with me." She said and walked into her apartment. "Goodnight Kendall." She said.

"G'night Jo." I told her and she smiled at me before closing the door. I walked back to the apartment alone. James, Carlos and Logan had been waiting up for me but I just walked past them and walked into the bathroom to take a shower. While smiling at myself in the mirror, I realized that Jessica too had been looking at me tonight. Could it be possible that she felt the same way about me? Or was it just that she was trying to show me that we were still just friends, even after all that had happened, almost happened and never really happened between us? Would she ever love me the way I have always loved her? I went to sleep knowing that only time would tell and praying that this crazy plan might actually work...

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**_A/N: Sooo what did you think? Do you think Kendall might fall for Jo again? :O Will Jessica ever talk to Kendall about her feelings? Do you think Jeremy knows? I mean he isn't made of stone and he does have a brain... And the way Jess and Kendall are acting towards each other isn't exactly unnoticable^^. Review and I'll try to write as fast as I can, but right now I am really busy with my family since it's summer and all so I can't promise anything ;). By the way WHO IS GOING TO WATCH HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS PART 2? I AM! :D :D :D :D YAY!_**

**_Okay. My Harry Potter nerd moment is over now :)_**

**_Have an amazing day and don't forget to leave a review! ;) If I get many reviews I might put this story first on the "to-write"-list ;)_**

**_xoxo_**

**_Spicy_**


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